To save Sev
by Queen Tonda O Lay
Summary: Its 6th year and Lilly is determined to try and stop Sev from becoming a Death Eater, but things don't go according to plan... She finds Snape, but it's not the Snape she's looking for.  ** AU
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This story is about Lilly and Sev but he doesn't come in till the second chapter. **

It was the first day of her sixth year and Lilly Evans was more thankful then ever to be back at Hogwarts. That summer had been a particularly unpleasant one at home, her sister Petunia was even more nasty then usual, delighted by the fact that Lilly lost her best friend, the only one she had at home, at the end of the last school year.

_"Where's your freaky little friend? Shouldn't you two be out doing whatever you freaks do?" "You know, you're better off without him. People like you shouldn't even be allowed to have friends." "I'd invite you to come along with my friends and I, but we wouldn't want anyone to see what a freak you are. You know I do have a reputation to uphold, and unlike you I will only be seen with the right type of people." _

The words of her sister had stung worse that summer than they had another. Were they meaner? She honestly couldn't remember. In the past she didn't spend to much time at home. But she had had no where to go this time, no best friend to escape with, she had never felt so lonely in her whole life. Of course she had not spent the whole summer completely alone, she saw a few of she school friends, but only a hand full of times, and none of those friends could fill the void that was left in side her due to a Slytherin by the name of Severus Snape.

Lilly had a plan, she was going try and fix that void, and she knew exactly how she was going to do it. Years of being best friends with a Slytherin allowed her to pick up a thing or two.

After stepping off the train in Hogsmead she pushed her way through the crowd of fellow students in an effort to catch up with four in particular. She was actually only looking for one, but where ever one was the other three were never far away. She spotted the back of his head, his black messy hair sticking up at all sorts of odd angles, and made an attempt push on faster but found her self unsuccessful and the crowd between them only grew thicker as people excited other train cars.

Lilly sighed, _so much for not being seen by the entire school,_ "Potter!" She shouted, a few people turned to look at her but not him. "Hey! Potter!" and again he did not hear her. _Damn it! _ Lilly took a deep breath this time getting prepared to yell at the top of her lungs, "James Potter! For Merlin's sake have you gone deaf?"

That caught his attention. James Potter stopped walking and turned around, causing a few people to bump into him as he did so to see who had called him. Lilly waved to him and asked that he wait up, he nodded and instructed his friends to go on ahead and meet him by the carriages.

James felt his heart beat a little faster as she approached, her shiny red hair bouncing behind her in the warm September night. She was the only person who made him nervous, and the only girl he fancied in all his time at Hogwarts, who just so happened to be the only girl who couldn't stand the sight of him. James brought his hand up to the back of his head to ruffle his hair,something he did when he was nervous or felt uncomfortable in a situation, but stopped when he remember her telling him that she hated how he did that. _ Not the only thing she hates about you, idiot. _

"H-hey Evens," James greeted flashing her his brightest smile, which she walked along side by side as the crowd thinned out making small talk.

"How was your summer?" Lilly's smile faltered, "It was alright, my sister and I don't get along very well. I mean, I try because I want us to be close, we used to be when we were kids. She's afraid though, of magic and all, so she wants nothing to do with me and I don't know why but this summer it bothered me more than usual." She finished in a failed attempt to shrug nonchalantly which didn't go unnoticed by James.

The carriages came into sight, and James' three friends who had been standing around waved for his attention. Every thing was going according to Lilly's plan.

When they reached his friends they all greeted her a little apprehensively, the last time she had spoked to the leader of their little group, they were sure she was going to hex him or accidentally set him on fire with her anger, the way that children can accidentally do before they learn to use their magic properly. Their friend looked okay, pretty happy actually so they didn't ask any questions. And when they thought she wasn't looking as they went to board their carriage one boy, Sirius Black, elbowed James and whispered; "Looks like your luck has turned around, Eh' Prongs"

Lilly situated her self in between James and Remus Lupin, a fellow prefect who she was friendly with. She sat quietly as the quartet known as the Marauders talked loudly around her about; pranks they couldn't wait to pull, Quidditch, and classes. She half listened to them not really interested in their conversations. She made sure to _accidentally _brush her hand against his when she readjust her tie and, the way she sat her thigh touched his when ever there was a bump in the path.

The carriage ride to the school was not a long one, but it was long enough for Lilly that night, she was starting to become anxious. She was the last one to climb down out. Like a proper gentleman James extended a hand to help her graciously accepted even though she didn't need any help. When her feet touched the ground she thanked him but didn't let go of his hand. Instead she pulled him in to whisper something to him. "Do you think I could talk to you about something," She cast a glance at the other boys "privately."

On the walk to the Great Hall the pair allowed themselves to get slightly separated from his friends again, before they snuck off, unnoticed by anyone around them, down a long corridor, walking all the way to the end.

"So what's it you wanted to talk to me about Evens?" James asked leaning causally against the wall and, once again resisting the urge to touch his hair._ She sure does look beautiful in this torch light. _Noticing the way it made her red hair glow, like a halo of fire.

Lilly looked down at her shoes "Uh well, um I was hoping I could ask you for a favor," meeting her green eyes that looked like glowing emeralds with his hazel ones,"but only if it's not to much trouble." She added hastily.

"Yeah, sure. What do you need?" Jumping at the chance to help and show her how great a guy he was. Lilly broke eye contact and stared down the corridor in the direction they had just come from. They were missing the sorting which Lilly liked to see because as a prefect she liked getting a chance to match the first years names to faces and see what house they were in. _ Oh well, this is a bit more important. I'll just catch up on it latter._

Running her hand though her hair she looked back to James and launched into her spiel. "You know how I told you about my sister?" He nodded "Well,"She continued, "She said something particularly nasty to me right before I got on the train and I can't get it out of my head. It kinda killed all my excitement about coming back and I'm just not in the mood for all the festivities and excitement of tonight."

James looked slightly perplexed. "Okay…" He really hoped that she wasn't asking him to miss the feast to walk around with her or something. Of course he wouldn't say no if that's what she wanted, he just hadn't eaten in a few hours and the start of term feast always had the best food.

"You're probably wondering what this could have to do with you… I'm sorry, I'll get to that soon. I love my room mates, there great and all but after five years of rooming with them I know how they are. You know how it is." Lilly looked around again, making sure that no one was around, they'd be in trouble if they were caught. Not a lot of trouble but they could lose house points and that would not be a good way to start off the year.

"They're all going to want to catch up about what we all did over the summer and on all the latest gossip the moment we all finnish unpacking, and I really don't want to listen to how they all had so much fun on vacations with _their _families, while I sat around home getting picked on by my mean spirited sister. In all honesty I kinda want to get away from it for a while, the whole tower really. I just want to be left alone for a little while. I was hoping you could help me."

It wasn't a lie, she really didn't want to talk about her summer , her sister really did say something extra mean to her, and James was the only one who could help her. So what if she left out a minor detail about what she wanted to do was.

If she wanted to be alone he and Sirius could easily convince some of the second year boys to abandon their room for a few hours, and make sure none of the boys in the tower even thought of going in there. However James had a feeling he knew what she was getting at, but decided to ask anyway.

"How?"

"Well, I was wondering If I could borrow your cloak." Lilly asked putting on just a little bit of a sweet hopeful air. He pursed his lips and scratched the back of his neck, " Um… erm its kind of a family heirloom, my father would have my head if something happened to it. I'm not really supposed to have it at school."

Lilly's shoulders slumped slightly, but she wasn't deterred. _Time to kick up the feminine charm Evens. _

She stepped a bit closer to him so there was only about half an arms distance in between them and looked up at him batting her long lashes with her hands clasped to her chest . "Please James,"

He scratched his neck again. "I…Uh well…" _ Pout your lips just ever so slightly. _"I'll be supper careful. I promise I won't let anything happen. I don't want to go outside, just for a little walk around the castle." He was starting to cave. "If someone caught you… I'd get…" _Now touch his arm._ "If I get caught I'll take all the blame. I promise James, you wont get in trouble at all. I'll tell them that I went to your room saying I had to speak to Remus and I saw it in your trunk while you were unpacking. So when no one was looking I stole it and you have no idea I have it." Lilly reassured him. _That should do it._

James bit his lip and thought about it for a minute. "Alright. I guess it couldn't hurt to let you borrow it. You are just getting away from your roommates after all. It's not like you're running through the forbidden forest or anything right."

_Running through the forest? Why in the world would I want to do that? _ Lilly wondered but did not say anything. Instead she smiled her brightest smile, for real this time, and threw her arms around him.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you so much! Oh James you have no idea how much this means to me, I can't even begin to tell you! You're the best. I promise I'll make it up to you some how, thank you so much." Lilly exclaimed and gave him a kiss on the cheek before she unwrapped her arms from him.

His face matched the color of his tie and there was a small dreamy smile on his lips.

"We need to go now, dinner should be starting any minute." She said snapping him out of what ever little fantasy he was in.

They walked in science down the dark empty hall, the only sound being their shoes on the stone floor, until they reached the doors of the Great Hall.

Lilly spoke; "When we get in there just play along. We will pretend I caught you doing something, like hmmm… planting dungbombs to go off as everyone leaves. Alright?"

James just nodded and put on a guilty face. "Good."

Lilly opened the door to the Great hall, shook her head at Potter in a way that said 'I am very disappointed in you' , and ushered him in. As the two walked to their house table the headmaster caught her eye, giving her a questioning look.

Cooly Lilly pointed to the badge on her robe then to the boy walking in front of her and shrugged her shoulders as if to say 'what can you do'. The old wizard smiled warmly at her , he bought it.

Smiling at her thoughts, she sat down with her friends.

_Maybe I should have been a Slytherin, that was way to easy… _


	2. Chapter 2

When dinner was over Lily led the first years up to the common room, explaining all about the moving stairs, talking portraits, the armor suits that really did move, how some doors disappeared and all the other weird little things the building did that made life as a tiny first year hard.

"This is the entrance to our common room" She explained motioning to the portrait of the Fat Lady "The password is Fingerling. Don't forget it or else you'll be stuck out here until someone comes by and lets you in. Everyone got that?" The group of first years nodded "Fingerling." The portrait swung open and lilly stepped through.

The new students filled in behind her one by one until they all were standing in the room. She gave them a moment to look around, there was a lot to take in. The castle was huge, she remembered being slightly overwhelmed on her first night. They were quickly marched across the castle, they weren't really given much of an explanation of anything, and then as soon as they reached the common room they were all whisked away to their dorm rooms. By the time Lily had processed everything that night she felt incredibly unprepared despite all that Severus had told her about the school.

"Alright, Remus here," Lily jabbed her thumb in the direction of the quietest of the Marauders who was standing near by trying to ignore his friends attempts to distract him "is going to show the boys to their rooms, and I will be taking the girls to theirs. Before we separate does anyone have any questions?" A few of the children looked like they wanted to ask something but no one raise their hands. _Probably just a little intimidated by all of this._ "Don't be shy. We don't bite… right Remus?" The boy in question looked alarmed for a second "N-no of course not." He replied giving the group in front of them what he hoped looked like a convincing smile.

Seemingly reassured several small hands shot up. Once all questions were answered the two sixth years led the first years to their new rooms.

Lily flopped down on her bed and kicked off her shoes and removed her robe and blazer, leaving her in just the skirt, sweater, and white button up shirt underneath. Her room mates already had begun unpacking and were nearly finished when she walked in, the four other girls were making light chit-chat but she knew it would only be a few minutes till they started gabbing about summer and the new years and boys. Wanting to get out as soon as she could, she got off the bed and popped open her pink, lily covered trunk.

Quickly she hung her uniforms and a few of her nicer clothes in her closet, putting the rest in the bottom draw of her nightstand, leaving the middle draw open for some miscellaneous items and the top would have to wait till she went to Hogsmead before it got filled, Lily Evens had a terrible weakness for sweets, especially chocolate. Severus had got her hooked on chocolate frogs on her first train ride and on more than one occasion she got her self sick from having one to many.

Glancing at the clock, once everything that needed to be unpacked had been put away, she noticed it was about an hour after curfew, _still to early_.

Sighing to her self she sat down and joined the conversation the other girls were having.

"So," Said Mary Macdonald, the pretty blonde sitting on the bed to the left of Lily "Do tell, what were you really doing with James during the sorting. Don't think we didn't see you with James Potter down at the station, I highly doubt you were actually doing anything that has to do with your prefect status." the others eagerly nodded in agreement wishing to hear why the red head who couldn't stand the sight of James Potter was sneaking off with him.

Lily smirked "Well lets just say James wants back in my good book after last year and we were talking about what he can do to make it up to me." The girls smiled knowingly to each other,her room mates have been trying to get her to say yes to him since third year and were glad to see their efforts may finally be paying off. "And" Continued Lily, "I am meeting him tonight. As a matter of fact, I better get going. Don't wait up for me." and with that she grabbed her trainers and strode out of the room before anyone asked any questions.

Stoping in the common room only to put her shoes on, Lily headed straight up to the boy's room. The male dormitory looked almost identical to the girls save for the fact that the the female's furniture looked slightly more feminine and was equipped with a vanity. Finding the door labeled _6th years; Black, Lupin, Pettigrew, Potter. _She gave ita short sharp knock and waited for it to open. From with in the room came the sound of something heavy crashing to the ground, a muffled curse (of the non magical kind), and then what sounded like marbles being scattered across the stone floor before a breathless James Potter answered the door.

"H-hey Lily, come on in." Moving past the flustered boy she stepped into the room sure enough someone's trunk had fallen to the ground, James's by the looks of it, some of the contents had spilled out onto the floor including a bag of gum balls that scattered across the floor, some of which had rolled into ink that was leaking out of a broken ink pot and inching across the stone. Lily gave a small wave to the other boys who were sitting on the edge of their beds looking at her curiously or in Sirius Black's case rather smugly.

The leader of this small gang of boys closed the door and went over to his trunk, circumnavigating the gum balls and spilled into pick up his wand. With a flick of his wrist, the fallen trunk righted its self, all the fallen contents picked themselves up and neatly climbed back in, the ink retreated back into the pot which fixed itself and, lastly the gum balls (now all ink free) rolled back into a jar, the lid tightly replacing its self once the last ball was safely inside. With another flick of the wrist, the uniforms, nearly folded on his bed stood up as if being worn by an invisible person and walked across the room to an empty closet, and proceeded to hang them selves on hangers before going limp once more. _ Show off_. Lily nearly rolled her eyes but she had to admit it was kind of cool.

The whole display reminded her of the walking broomsticks in the film Fantasia she had seen as a child.

She could almost picture James Potter wearing a blue sorcerer's hat with stars and a moon on it, trying to control hundreds of broomstick from causing chaos, that he started of course.

Snapping out of her thoughts she brought her attention back to James who was riffling through Sirius's trunk. "Mate, where is it?" he asked looking up at the trunks owner. "Charms book." he replied still looking half amused at his best friend. Finding what he was looking for James stood up and handed Lily a large piece of parchment that had been folded neatly "Here, this will help you from getting caught." She eyed it curiously wondering how in Merlins name a sheet of parchment would help her. Lily took it from him none the less.

On James' bed she noticed a heap of silvery black fabric embroidered with silver celestial bodies and what could have been ancient runes but she was not completely sure for she did not recognize them. Seeing her eyeing it, the usually cocky sixth year (who, no longer flustered, had returned to his normal self) picked it up and held it up. "Ah, this here, Mademoiselle, is the finest of cloaks, only for the finest of ladies." he smoothly informed her with a wink. Despite her self, Lily felt color rise in her cheeks. The red head simpered at him and replied coyly, "or perhaps the finest of gentlemen. No?" Taking that as a good sign he held open the cloak and moved to stand behind her, just a bit closer then necessary. "Touche." Lily could feel goosebumps rising on her neck where his warm breath touched her skin. She found her self thankful that he could not see as he draped the fabric around her and fastened the silver clasp at the front.

_Oh for merlin's sake girl get a hold of your self! This is James Potter, Potter, remember he's a big headed, arrogant, cocky jerk most of the time. You're on a mission to go see Severus, not here to be charmed by the enemy. _

Resolving not to be charmed by his smooth words like some little fourth year she took a step away from him. Looking down at her feet, or where they should be she gasped. "Merlin's beard! Look my body is gone. This is amazing!" Lily exclaimed awe, twirling around so they could all get a good look at her body, or in this case the lack there of. The four boys chuckled at her amazement, as they were all quite aware and unfazed by this,being used to the cloak after years of using it.

"Yes, well love that is the point of an _invisibility _cloak." quipped Sirius Black, grinning cheekily. With a roll of the eyes she told him; "I'm very much aware of that, Black, but it is still quite shocking to look down and find one's body is gone." To that he gave a shrug and grunted in agreement.

Turning back to the aforementioned cloak's owner she hugged him once more with a large genuine smile on her pretty face. "This is more amazing then I thought, thank you so much." She released the boy who was now blushing madly. "I better get going though, I'll bring it back first thing tomorrow morning if that's alright." Potter, who seemed to be having trouble forming words suddenly, nodded and watched her flip up the hood, open the door, presumably stepped out of the room and shut the door again.

Lily reached the empty common room and sat in one of the chairs and pulled off the hood. _Better figure out what the hell this thing is before I'm on the other side of the castle._ Pulling out her wand, she unfolded the parchment in her lap and taped it.

Words started forming as if written by an invisible hand;

First appearing in a neatly spaced but scruffy hand writing was;

_Mr. Moony presents his complements to the lovely Miss Lily Evens, and would like to say that she is the best prefect he has seen during his stay at Hogwarts. Gryffindor and or otherwise. _

Followed by, in a neat scrawl;

_Mr. Prongs would like to say that he believes Miss Evens to be the most beautiful young woman to ever grace the halls of Hogwarts._

Next, in a beautiful and elegant script showing obvious long time experience and practice with a quill;

_Mr. Padfoot would like to agree with Mr. Prongs and add that Lily is an incredibly talented witch, one he would be most proud to take home to his parents. Blood status be damned!_

Finally in thin round writing;

_Mr. Wormtail is glad to see Miss Evens ditched that slimy Slytherin git for friends worthy of her and bids her a good day._

It didn't take much for her to figure out who the four were, and who was who. Remus had always been nice to her, she wouldn't say they were exactly friends but they worked together a lot. She suspected he may have had a mild crush on her back in fourth year. She couldn't help the blush on her cheeks from what James had written The most beautiful girl? _Ever?_ Maybe something was really wrong with that head of his, other then it being incredibly large of course. Sirius thought she was pretty? _He must just be agreeing because James is his best friend, but maybe he's not as much of a jerk as I thought… He did say I was talented, and I doubt he would take any ol' muggle-born home to those "purist nut cases". _She sincerely hoped, as much as she was honored that he'd be proud of her, that she would never meet his parents if they were as bad as he said they were. And lastly she really didn't like Peter. Something in his beady hungry eyes creeped her out, he never seemed to have a thought of his own. It was just like him to make fun of someone from where he couldn't get hurt. She knew damn well that when he is by himself he wouldn't _dare _to make fun of Severus or anyone for that matter. He was to cowardly to face the consequences.

As nice as what they all said, well not Peter, but nice as it was it couldn't help her. Before she could get up to go give it back to James, she saw him come down the stairs into the common room. Seeing him, she stood up, appearing to be nothing more than a set of disembodied hands and a head.

"I was just about to come back up." She told him as he stepped into the cozy scarlet room. Holding up the parchment she gave him an amused look . "As sweet as this is, I don't think complements will be of much help in avoiding getting caught. Although they did help cheer me up after what my sister said. So thanks, again…" she trailed off and looked down at her floating hands.

"It complimented you? Thank Merlin! It usually just says nasty insults. I was hoping to catch you before you tried using it." He looked relived that no insults were given to the object of his desire. Before she could ask what it was, as if reading her mind, told her; "It's a map of the school. It shows where everyone is even if they are moving."

Lily couldn't help thinking it was pretty cool. That explained how they always managed to avoid getting caught, even with the cloak on. "So how does it work?" she was eager to see it, it would make finding Severus so much easier.

He took the mad from her hands and pulled his wand from his pocket. "For it to reveal it's self you say ,'_I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.'_

and the map will appear." Upon hearing the magic words, so to speak, Lily let out a small snort. _You four up to no good? Who would ever guess_. but her sarcastic remark died on her tong as she watched a map of the school crawl onto the page in a manner similar to the way an ink blot bleeds across a page. "Wow, where ever did you get something like this, it is incredible."

she asked, a look of wonder sparkling in her emerald green eyes.

A slight color came to his cheeks for just a few seconds before he seemed to gain just a bit more confidence, puffing his chest out a little, he replied . "Oh uh, well we didn't really get it any where, we made it."

"You guys _made _this?" Lily asked incredulously, finding it hard to believe that Hogwarts four biggest hooligans had the fore thought to make something to help them keep out of trouble. She knew they were all pretty talented, James and Sirius were, along with her, in the top ten of their class, above most of the Ravenclaws even.

He was clearly proud of his accomplishment and was enjoying Lily's look of awe because he seemed to gain even more confidence.

"Yeah, all of us did a little something but it was mostly Sirius's work. He did almost all the magic on it and he was the who mapped out all seven floors, but I helped."

_If I knew she would be so impressed I'd have show it to her a while ago. _

"Peter thought of the idea to have it only reveal it's self to those who know how to use it. Remus drew it and I thought of it but anyway if something happened to the map Sirius would have a fit, he has a bit of an attachment to it. Never seen him so proud of anything before, except getting disowned but that's Padfoot for ya." James finished wish a nonchalant wave of the hand.

The news of Black's disownment surprised Lily, she knew he disagreed with his family but he wasn't even of age yet and they disowned him, she didn't know it was that bad.

The two chatted for a few more minutes and he showed her what to say when she was done to hide the map.

The ancient grandfather clock creaked and groaned from it's spot in the room before proceeding to interrupt their conversation with twelve loud, heavy chimes. _Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong, Bong._

Lily glanced at the clock "I should get going, I don't want to stay out to late... got a lot to do tomorrow and all."

James nodded giving her the map. He opened his mouth to say something but shut it again and watched her walk towards the portrait hole. She was about to step out when he called her back. "Hey Lily." She stopped and turned around. " The first Hogsmead trip is next month, would you like to come with me?" James asked hopefully " Just the two of us…not with my friends…" he added.

For a moment Lily considered the offer from the boy leaning on the mantel of the fire place in the empty common room. She could not miss the look of hope in his eyes or that unlike all the other times he has asked her out in one way or another, he was not acting extremely cocky. He was not her first choice on the list of people she'd spend a day alone with, but it would be just the two of them and he did seem considerably less arrogant and annoying when he wasn't with his friends. Remembering that she promised to make it up to him she gave him the answer he was hoping for; "I'd love to James."

Containing his excitement the best he could he let a goofy grin spread across his face, but resisted his urge to cheer or jump for joy. After four years his dream girl finally said yes, Lily was going to Hogsmead with him, _him_! He could hardly believe his luck.

When he didn't say anything else, Lily turned once more to leave but stopped.

"Oh James, if you happen to run into Mr. Prongs, tell him I think he's not so bad looking himself." With that she flipped up the hood of the cloak and disappeared out into the dark castle, leaving rather silly looking James Potter behind.

_I hope this works. Hell if this works I'll gladly spend every Hogsmead weekend with Potter for the rest of the year!_

**A/N: So I know I promised Snape would be in this chapter and I fully intended him to be but then I started writing and it didn't happen. This is turning out to be much longer then I had originally planned. This story was supposed to be a one shot but it decided that it wanted to be longer so… Just bear with me he's coming along soon. **

**P.S. Thanks for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

She was thankful for the torches that cast their dim flickering light on the otherwise lightless corridor for there was no moon on that night. It was a long walk from her tower down to the dungeons and the stillness of the castle made her feel as if she was the only person alive, alone with only her thoughts to keep her company.

She found her thoughts drifting to what she was going to say when she got to Severus. Would he listen to her? She knew it was dangerous for her to be sneaking into the Slytherin dorms, it was enemy territory, and not just be cause of the the house she belonged to. Severus shared a room with boys who she knew had fathers who were connected to the 'Dark Lord' as they called him or were planing on becoming Death Eaters. For some one of her blood status to just waltz on in there is asking for major trouble.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she feared that her ex-bestfreind would refuse to listen to her, or worse let his roommates at her. She shuddered to think what they would do if they all got her alone in a room. Her the outspoken,confident,and proud _'Mudblood'_ in their territory. They knew some evil terrible spells, ones they wouldn't hesitate to use on her. She also feared what non magical things they might do, they were sleazy creeps who had a habit of eyeing her like a piece of meat when she wasn't with Severus.

He never looked at her like that though. No, there was always something in those pitch black eyes of his, she couldn't put a finger on it but it was there every time he looked at her and her alone. He would never look at her the way they did, as if they were starving dogs and she was a juicy hunk of steak.

Lily honestly missed him. She missed the her best friend, not the awful Death Eater wannabe he became, but the boy she could trust all her secrets, her hopes and her dreams with, the one person she could be just Lily Evens around. It wasn't until the start of fifth year that she started to feel less comfortable around him but before then she never had to be _Lily the Gryffindor _or _Lily the muggle born _or _Lily the secret witch, _she was just her self.

She couldn't do that with anyone else, not one single person she knew.

She missed that dearly, at times she missed it so much she wished they were both muggles because maybe if they weren't in rival houses, or there was no dark magic, or a Dark lord, if blood status didn't exist, if they had both just staid in that little mill town of theirs, they would still be best friends.

There was nothing to be done about that though. What's done is done, they were born the way they were and can't help it. No amount of would've, should've, could've can fix anything.

What she could do however was stop him from ruining his life. The only problem was that he's as stubborn as an ox. Once Severus Snape has made up his mind about something it was next to if not completely impossible to change his mind. It was worth trying though.

It seemed, as Lily traveled farther and farther into the heart of the ancient castle that it was becoming darker and darker. At times it was becoming almost impossible to see even though there were torches burning brightly along the walls. Every few minutes she would step into a pool of light and check the map. So far she avoided her head of house and a ghost, but she did run into Filch's cat, Mrs. Tuffets. Not being able to help her self Lily, some one who usually holds a soft spot for animals in her heart gave the nosey,nasty old thing a good scare. She refused to forgive it for peeing on her favorite sweater the time she accidentally left it in the library. She was gone less then five minutes before she went back for it and when she did it was soaked, reeking of urea and that spiteful (for it truly was) creature had been lurking nearby. It reminded her of her sister Petunia (not that her sister urinated on sweaters)

It grew darker and darker until it seemed the blackness had swallowed all the light. It was a a dark like she had never seen before. It fell think and heavy throughout the air, feeling oppressive and all encompassing like a black velvet cloak worn on a muggy summer night.

It was not until Lily stumbled down a few steps that she realized she had no clue where she was. Illuminating the tip of her wand which cut through the dark like a knife, Lily counted only three steps but the falling sensation she felt deep in the pit of her stomach before hitting the ground lasted far too long to have been such a short distance. It lasted no more then a second but it wasn't right. Feeling a bit lightheaded she pulled out the map and found herself. She was in a corridor just near the Divination tower. How she got there she was not sure. She was on the other side of the castle just moments before, but Hogwarts is full of magical mysteries.

Back on her path Lily noticed things seemed to be slightly different. It looked as if someone had done a bit of redecorating she was sure that the painting of the fat lady's much hated sister (The skeletal thin maid) was farther from Gryffindor tower (The sisters refused to even be on the same side of the castle) and she could have sworn that the suit of armor she just passed liked to reside near a sunny window close to her charms class.

_Maybe I'm just a little out of it. I am pretty tired and the fall left me light headed, besides it's pretty dark, I could be confusing what I am seeing._

Upon seeing a totally unfamiliar statue she knew something was different. _I KNOW I've never seen that before."_What in Merlin's name!" She whispered quietly so that only she would hear._ First the weird darkness, then I end up across the castle, now everything he's been redecorated…I wonder if the castle is just different late at night. Some doors move from time to time…_

Deciding to ignore the suspicious redecoration of the school Lily began trying to prepare what to say once she got into Severus's room, going over different scenarios in her head.

_Ok, first I'll wake him up, then I'll tell him how stupid of mistake he is going to make. _

_'No. That will just make him angry.'_

_Ok, then what if I tell him how evil it all is, if it's power and respect he wants then he's going about it the wrong way, He'll just end up with control and fear. _

_'Nope. He'll say you don't understand, he doesn't see it the way you do. Think Lil you have known Severus for years, what could you say that would make the thought of ditching those wannabe Death Eaters appeal to him? What is appealing to Severus Snape? Come on. You know this!'_

"Hmmmm…."Lily pondered to her self as she walked along;_ What would appeal to Severus Snape. What, oh what, oh what in the world… He's not to concerned about friends, he's got those, it's there fault he's like this. Power and respect, but he's convinced the Dark Lord will give him a path to those. His pride!_

_If I appeal to that he is sure to at least listen, and from there I can hint at restarting our friendship. I know that he was devastated by our falling out, this might work. _

_Alright, how about telling him that I think he can do much better things, that he is going to be to powerful one day to be stuck serving someone else. Why serve what you could be served? After all he was named after a powerful Roman emperor, I'll make sure to mention that. If I boost his ego and maybe try and show him what he could become… a few compliments and harmless flirting wouldn't hurt either. Merlin knows that underneath all that anger and hatred is a teenage boy, one who I know finds me attractive._

(Lily learned that the _hard_ way while sitting on his lap in a swing, due to the other one being broken, at the park the summer before fifth year.)

_Oh! I can also make a point of asking how proud he will be when he is hauled off to Azkaban for killing muggle borns and blood traitors. I know he will say that the traitors like Potter and Black deserve it. But I will ask about his mother. _

That would get to him and from there she would just keep going, pushing him till he nearly cracked. But she wouldn't push him all the way. No then he would never listen.

_"Does she deserve it Severus? She's a pureblood who 'betrayed' her family and married a muggle. Doesn't that make her a blood traitor, based on your friends standers, I'd say it would."_ She knew every button to press when it came to him. For all of his cold attitude, he did secretly love his mother and was proud to have her pure blood running through him_. "Would you be proud to kill your own mother Severus Snape? To have the blood of the woman who gave you life, who's very blood runs in your own veins on you hands? Would you be able to sleep at night? How would you feel to find out your friends tortured her, cast horrible things on her, killed her! Hmmmm? I'm sure you wouldn't be upset though. She deserves it, she's a traitor to her own people. Just as bad as us filthy mudbloods!"_

_'That'll work. Even if it just plants a seed of doubt in his mind.' _

With that thought in mind Lily entered the dungeons, beginning the final leg of her journey to the serpentine house.

**A/N: So this one is kind of short , but I do have the next one mostly written. It should be up either over the weekend or early next week, And I PROMISE that Snape is in that one. Also I want to say thank you to all the people who have added this story to their favorites. **

**PS. Reviews, good and bad are greatly appreciated ;)**


	4. Chapter 4

It wasn't much farther, just about a five-hundred feet before she reached the entrance when she heard faint footsteps and before she could even look at the map to see who it was she collided with something or someone soft but yet pretty hard for a person. Lilly would have fallen back from the force of the impact, but a pair of arms roughly stopped her.

"I suggest you reveille your self immediately or I shall do it for you, and I will do it in a way most unpleasant." said a cold deep voice she did not recognize. _Must be the new DADA professor, didn't get a good look who replaced Professor McKay, maybe they've updated the curriculum to something useful..._

Lily Evens complied with the mysterious professor's wishes, she pulled back the hood of the cloak to reveal her face. "Lumos." The tip of the professor's wand suddenly cut through the darkness, illuminating her face, making her squint from the sudden brightness.

"And do tell me, what is a Gryffindor doing wandering by the Slytherin house, in the middle of the night, under an invisibility cloak?" He asked.

_How does he know what house I am in? He obviously saw you when you walked in late with James. Stupid. _

She figured she might as well tell him the truth, he was the new DADA professor so maybe he would go a bit easy on her if he new what she was going to do. "I had to see my best friend, sir. Well former friend I guess, he wants to become a Death Eater. He has so much potential and he's going to waste it serving that genocidal psycho, I just can't let him do that…" She told him.

"I assure you that if he has not taken the mark over the summer, that at breakfast he will be no more a Death Eater then he is right now. You may speak to him then." The professor replied impatiently. lowering his wand just slightly so she could see again.

"He would only think I am trying to make a fool of him if I attempted to speak to him at breakfast. Merlin forbid a_ filthy little mudblood like me _dares to speak to him in front of his friends." she replied bitterly

"Do not say that foul word! I assure you that despite what ever delusion you may be suffering, your blood is quite mud free." The man hissed. She was getting the impression that this professor was not a pleasant person.

"That is not what he believes, sir. He made quite the point of telling me, and half of Hogwarts last year." She wasn't sure what was making her speak back to this man, she was not the type to argue with a professor. Typically she was the kind of person who always followed a professor's orders. This was making for a very bad first impression.

"Foolish girl, why do you think you can change his mind then?" He wasn't sure why he was interrogating the girl, normally he would have simply deducted house points and given out detentions before dragging her back to her house. There was something about her...

"He's bloody brilliant! That's why, he just doesn't see it. He knows more about the dark arts and potions then another student here and is easily the most powerful. He was inventing his own spells, powerful,useful spells by the middle of fourth year. He thinks that everyone will respect him if he has that stupid thing on his arm, people won't pick on him for being poor or for the way he looks… I think if he only knew that someone believed in him, if he had some more confidence, then he wouldn't do it. He could be the next Dark Lord if he wanted, I think he really could. He'll be powerful enough one day. He already is more powerful then half the professors, sir. If you saw what he can do, really do. Its amazing! Before we even started first year he knew more spells then half the seventh year, I swear!"

She knew she probably sounded half crazy but she didn't care.

"I'll do what ever I can to stop him. I'll beg, plead, I hate the dark arts but I'll help him study them, I'll study them myself for Merlin's sake! I know he's fancied me since we were in second year, I'll throw my self at him, marry him, anything as long as he doesn't become a Death Eater. He's just so much better than that. He begged me to forgive him and I refused. I was a bloody idiot, the last good influence on him. I have to try Sir!" Lily was on the verge of hysteria now, all the pain of losing him, the loneliness and, rejection all bubbled to the surface at once.

Feeling what he believed may be sympathy, being he was not sure he ever felt it before, he decided to offer her some help. If only to get her to go to bed, he was sure that she was the most stubborn Gryffindor he had met in all his life . Any other student he had ever caught wandering the halls usually took off running all the way back to their common rooms to avoid getting into even more trouble. All but one… He would not sit back and let a student of his become a Death Eater. Perhaps that is why he was not threatening to expel her at this point….

"Tell me who this student is, I assure you I shall personally speak to them on your behalf on this subject. I know first hand the horrors that await him."

She sighed. "Okay, well he has long greasy hair, pale skin, and a rather large nose. but he's pretty stubborn Sir, it will take a lot for him to even listen. Tell him, Severus, that-" but Lily didn't get to tell the professor the message she wished for him to convey because he was suddenly enraged.

"How dare you! You insolent little girl, be thankful you are not in my house or you would be on the train home before your classmates even woke for breakfast!" His deep voice echoed off the stone walls of the dungeon carrying far down the corridor. Although she could not see his face, she had a feeling it had gone white with rage. The professor continued; "Wandering around the castle in the middle of the night, trying to sneak into another house, and showing such disrespect, I expect better even out of Potter, that arrogant,attention seeking, rule breaking boyfriend of your's and his friends, Ms. Weasley" seethed he.

furrowing her brow in confusion Lily meekly replied "My name is not Ms. Weasley, sir. And Potter is most defiantly not my boyfriend! My name is Lily Evens."

If the new professor was furious before it was nothing compared to now. Saying nothing he roughly grabbed her arm and swiftly marched down the corridor pulling her with him. She struggled to keep from stumbling while keeping up with him and avoiding stepping on his billowing black robes. Wanting to cry out from the pain in her shoulder where it felt like her arm was being pulled from her socket she bit down on her lip she doubted protesting would help and no one could hear them anyway.

It was several minutes and one very painful staircase latter when he abruptly stopped and roughly shove her into Slughorn's office, slamming the door behind her. For a moment they were plunged into total darkness, the torches flickered into life casting dancing shadows on all sorts of strange and glistening jared things on the tall shelves lining the walls.

It was brighter here then it was in the corridor. She saw that he was tall and thin, his black hair hung down just above his shoulders and from what wasn't cast in shadow she could see he had a hooked nose and sallow face. He carried himself in a very formidable almost elegant way, in the way she imagined a much feared ruler would.

_Why does he look familiar?_

Approaching her her spoke in barely above a whisper. "I do not care to know what sort of sick joke you are your Mr. Potter are playing Ms Weasley, masquerading around the castle as his dead mother. But! It has his good for nothing Godfather written all over it, I assure you all that he has told you this past summer are lies. It is clear he has disillusioned you into thinking it funny to make a mockery of me. I will see to the expulsion of both you and Mr. Potter with the utmost of pleasure."

It was terrifying, she had no clue what he was speaking about but she was scared of expulsion. It was clear he was not the professor to anger. As scared as she was of him there was something else about him that made her want to argue back and she just couldn't help her self.

Taking a step back Lily, straining to keep her voice from wavering and showing her fear said "Professor, sir. I truly don't know what you are talking about. One trip to Hogsmead that has not yet happened doesn't make me Potter's nor he mine. I am only accompanying him in return for a favor. I have certainly never met his godfather in my life, I spent my summer at home with my family. I was not even aware his mother was dead. I am a prefect sir! I would never make a mockery of a professor. My name is Lily Evens, I am a sixth year and all I was doing was trying to stop someone who has so much potential from waisting their life!"

Who was this man to accuse her of all sorts of absurd things and try to have her expelled! He didn't even know her name.

"Sit." The professor motioned to a wooden chair in front of the desk. Not wanting to anger him more she did as told and took the seat. Standing several paces in front of her then pointed his wand at her _"Finite incantatem!"_ he cried. Even though she felt nothing upon the spell's impact she still flinched. Muttering to himself he began rummaging around on the shelves for something. Looking around Lily noticed a stack of ungraded papers on the desk. Curiosity as to why they were there on the first night she silently ruffled though them. She knew Slughorn wouldn't care, infect he would probably be happy if she did. He hated grading and would be more then happy to pass them off to her for extra credit.

Leafing through a few of them she decided that they must be first years, none of the names were recognizable.

"Professor, perhaps if you are having trouble finding something I could find it. I helped Slughorn organize at the end of last term."

He did not take kindly to his for he whirled around on the spot giving her a look that could kill. "Professor Slughorn has been retired for longer than you have been alive, and I keep a much cleaner store room then that man."

_Slughorn was at the feast! What is this man talking about? _

"But Sir, I saw him at the feast earlier! I missed your introduction but I know I saw him." Lily insisted.

Abandoning his search all together he stalked over to her looking murderous

"Despite what ever delusions you have been suffering for the last four years, I have been your potions professor for the your entire stay in this school, one that will be coming to an end tonight may I remind you. So unless you wish to bring further trouble to yourself, I suggest you drop the act, Ms. Weasley " His deep voice was nearly above a whisper. It was terrifying. So terrifying she didn't even correct him on her name this time.

_Some Gryffindor you are._

After rummaging for a few minutes more he pulled a small vial off the shelf. Coming back to where she sat, he uncorked the vial, sniffed it's contents and ordered she take a sip. Rather then do as he said, she clamped her lips tightly together, so tight they turned white. "This will not hurt you Ms. Weasley. Open your mouth or I shall do it for you." Obliging out of fear Lily opened her mouth and allowed him to tip a small amount of the potion into her mouth.

Within a minute she felt her as though her head was filled with fog. The professor watched as her eyes glazed over before speaking again.

"What color is your hair?" He asked

"Red" She replied in a monotone voice as if she had no control of her vocal cords or her mouth for that matter. The black clad man continued his questioning...

"What is the name of this school?"

"Hogwarts school of witch craft and wizardry."

"what house are you in?"

"Gryffindor."

"How old are you?"

"Sixteen."

"What year is it?"

"1976"

"What is your full name?"

"Lily Ann Evens"

"From whom did you acquire this invisibility cloak?"

"James Potter."

"How?"

"I flirted with him and tricked him into thinking I was just going for a walk."

"Is he your boyfriend?"

"No."

"What were you doing wandering by Slytherin House?"

"I was on my way to speak to Severus Snape."

"What did you need to speak to him about?"

"I wish to stop him from becoming a Death Eater."

"What is your relation to Mr. Snape?"

"He was my best friend for many years."

"Why did you end the friendship?"

"He called me a Mudblood." The professor flinched at this.

"How did you discover you were a witch?"

"Severus Snape told me when we were nine."

"What was the name of the neighborhood Severus lives in?"

"Spinner's End."

"What did he give you for your fifteenth birthday?"

"Perfume he brewed."

"What was the sent?"

"Lavender, Honeysuckle, and Vanilla."

"Have you ever had romantic feelings for Severus Snape?"

"Yes."

"When?"

"During my fourth year at Hogwarts."

"How did he acquire the scar on his right shin?"

" He sliced his leg open on a broken branch trying to keep me from falling out of a tree we climbed."

"What was your favorite nickname for him?"

"Dr. Pangloss."**

"What was his nick name for you?"

"Blodeuwedd."***

"Who do you think I am?"

"This years new DADA professor."

Satisfied with his questioning, the professor forced another potion down her thought and watched the glassy look in her eyes fade, to be replaced by one of fire.

"Did you just give me Veritaserum? I am a student that is illegal!" She yelled, jumping to her feet, if looks could kill he would be dead and buried.

Remaining calm, too calm, he simply replied "You are not my student Lily." Her name rolling off his tongue slowly as if he were trying to savor the taste of a rare delicacy.

"If your not a professor then who are you?" there was a look of fear in her eyes as she took a step back from him and pulled out her wand. Surveying her situation she realized with dismay that she would have to pass him to exit the room. It could be done, a body bind or stunning hex would easily take care of that but if he pulled his wand on her it would be hard to hit him.

"I'm not going to hurt you Lily. I promise." She clearly didn't buy it, stepping back farther into the shadows of the room lined with shelves of potions.

"I said who are you!" _Come on Lils your a Gryffindor don't let him see that he's scaring you! _Swallowing loudly she shook off the fear replacing it with suspicion. "Tell me who you are or I will curse you! Don't think I won't do it. I can curse your awful nose right off your face." Lily threatened taking a stance that reminded him of a Lion ready to pounce. A small smile formed on the man's lips as he chuckled obviously amused by her threat. "Lily you would never use Sectumsempra and we both know it. Now put your wand away."

She did not do as he asked but instead of retreating again she stepped closer. "How do you know that curse?" Lily wanted to get out of the room and back to the safety of her own room as soon as possible. She silently vowed never to sneak out again, and never to go to the dungeons alone. Chuckling some more he looked her in the eye and told her he invented it.

"You did not! Sev-" She began, but expecting her reaction he cut her off. "Yes, Severus invented it. And you hated it when I showed you it, and you still hate it, Lil." She was totally lost, she never saw him before in her life.

Sensing her confusion, he gracefully pointed a long bony and pale finger at the desk.

Sitting there right at the front was an engraved sliver name plate reading;

_PROFESSOR S. SNAPE; POTIONS MASTER._

Eying him carefully, Lily picked it up. She could not believe what it said. How could this grown man before her be him, he was a sixteen year old! She saw him at the feast that night, there was no way in the world this could be possible. _Maybe this is just a bad dream Lily, you probably just fell asleep talking to the girls. _Clenching her fist around her wand, she dug her fingernails into her palm, she could feel them and when she opened her hand there was a row of half moon indentations in her skin.

It was not a dream.

Looking around again Lily noticed that the room was quite different then the last time she had been in it. The crystal jars on the marble shelf behind the desk that held Slughorn's most rare and valuable potions and ingredients were all gone, replaced by several glass jars holding strange pickled looking substances Lily dared not ask about. In the center of the shelf stood a small silver statue of a wizard and a cauldron. The wizard, his clad in long robes and a pointed hat, stood behind a large cauldron that reached his waist and was emitting small puffs of steam every few seconds. In his left hand he held a vial and in his right was a wand, which he raised above his head. On the base of the statue it read; _Severus Snape, for extraordinary contribution to the most noble science. _

"But how…?" She wondered to her self out loud, completely perplexed. It was as if she fell into an alternate universe… "What year is it sir?" Why she asked she wasn't sure but it came out on impulse.

Looking at her suspiciously for a moment, he answered "1995"

Lily's beautiful green eyes widened in surprise. It couldn't be, that would mean somewhere between her tower and the dungeons she ended up nineteen years into the future. For a moment she let it all settle in.

_1995, nineteen-ninety-five, Nine Teen Ninety Five! Professor Snape…. Potions master; Professor S. Snape. The pale skin, greasy black hair, the nose! Could it really be him? Oh it must be! _

She placed the name plate back on his desk and stood before the Snape. Her green eyes were calculating in the dim light as she surveyed his pale, weary looking face. His usually ramrod straight posture began to drop as his shoulders hunched forward as if he were pulling himself inward to protect himself from the intensity of her gaze. He knew now what it was like to be one of his students. If anyone were to walk in at that moment they, like Lily, would wonder if they stepped into another universe. To see the formidable Professor Snape, the most feared man in the schoolcowering under the gaze of a Gryffindor who's head barely reached his shoulder. A most strange sight indeed.

After standing there for what may have been seconds or hours, neither could tell, Lily spoke, testing him. Her voice was soft and quiet, if she spoke to loud he might disappear. "On the emerald green Lily pad lives a frog…" she began

"He is the Half-blood Prince of Spinner's End." He finished, equally as soft and quiet as her. It was their code, a secret handshake of sorts, an oath of friendship only they knew.

_It is Him!_

**A/N:**

**Snape has finally arrived! I'm not really sure if I portrayed him correctly. I hope I did, or at least it wasn't too bad. I'd love to hear what you guys think, like always I'm open to constructive criticism.**

**** Dr. Pangloss**

_Character from Voltaire's Candide._

_The royal educator of the court of the baron. Described as "the greatest philosopher of the Holy Roman Empire." Pangloss defends optimism, and his reasoning is silly at best._

(Lily calling Sev this is meant to be ironic, poking fun at his sour disposition.)

*****Blodeuwedd **

_Celtic Goddess._

_Description: Lily maid of Celtic initiation ceremonies. Known as the Ninefold Goddess of the Western Isles of Paradise. Created by Math and Gwydion as a wife for Lleu. The Maiden form of the Triple Goddess, her symbol was the owl. _

_Rules Over: Flowers, wisdom, lunar mysteries, initiations._


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I want to sincerely apologize for taking over a month to update. I've been swamped with papers to write for school and running stage crew for my school's musical. Thank you to anyone who is still interested in this, I'll try not to let it happen again.**

Lily could hardly believe her eyes, here she was, sixteen years old standing in front of her best friend, as a grown man. From the looks of it life had not been easy for him, not that it ever had been. He was still as skinny and pale as ever. How ever he was several inches taller as an adult, he no longer looked sickly and he seemed to cary himself with a confident, formidable air as apposed to the insecure defensive one he carried himself with as a teenager.

It was slightly overwhelming.

"Oh thank merlin Severus, I ran into you and not someone else! I have no clue how I got here! I was on my way to find you and, well you know. I explained what I was doing when I ran into you.." she cried, then surprising them both, she flung her arms around his neck. Severus went stiff as a board for a moment, taken off guard by the sudden physical contact.

Slowly he raised his arms to delicately return the hug.

Taking a deep breath Snape noticed that she smelled exactly how he remembered her smelling. Coconut and Vanilla. It was the scent of her favorite shampoo, Summer sun, if he recalled correctly which he did. The scent brought flooding back memories of hot days spent by the river at home, sunny days by the lake here at Hogwarts, quietly walking around the grounds, and reading in the library. The things he and Lily loved to do together when they were friends… _best friends_.

He tightened his arms to pull her closer, for the bitter professor it was nearly to much. Love and hate, joy and misery, euphoria and heartbreak; all swirling within his chest at once. It unnerved him, he could tell a bold faced lie to the most evil wizard to ever live without breaking a sweat but yet she could bring him to his knees with absolutely no effort. The last time he held her was the night she died.

Letting go of her he grabbed onto the self behind him for support, his legs were threatening to give out beneath him. His whole body was shaking ever so slightly. Silently summoning the chair from his desk he took a seat and looked at her. Lily was wearing a small amused smile on her face, on that as children she often wore when she thought he wasn't looking. Chuckling slightly she rolled her eyes at him "Oh Severus I know you've never liked them but hugs are not _that _bad. You look as though you have seen a ghost," She paused for a moment before adding "metaphorically speaking of course."

When he made no acknowledgment at her attempt to be funny, something he had always done (usually in the form of rolling his eyes or giving her a rather pointedly _un_-amused look) when they were friends no matter how lame it was, she got a little concerned. "Severus" she took a step closer to the pallid man "What's wrong?"

He shook his head and scoffed "Oh you have no idea, Lily Evens." realizing he may have said to much, for she would surely question what he meant, Professor Snape added; "It is 1998 and you are standing in my office as your sixteen year old self. We have not spoken in over seventeen years."

As cold and cruel of a man he may seem to those around him he did not have the heart to tell Lily, his only real friend, the love of his life, that in five years (in her time) she would be dead. Not yet at least.

Lily's pretty face changed from worried to crestfallen, something in his low voice told her that this was not by his choice. _He obviously isn't a Death Eater if he works at Hogwarts. Dumbledore would never hire someone who was that evil. Why haven't I talked to him in that long? _Taking a good look at him she could see that his face looked much older then his thirty-five years. He had, as long as she could remember, been sickly looking; extremely thin with pale sallow skin and long black greasy hair. This much had not changed but his face looked hard now, worn down by years of misery. His forehead had deep creases, there were permanent frown lines by his mouth, he was paler then ever before and his eyes looked like two spheres of cold black marble in the flickering light. _Has life continued to be unkind to you Severus? What happened to the boy I met in the park, so full of hope and ambition?_

_Maybe it has to do with the fact you haven't spoken to him in years. You were probably the only best friend he's ever had._

"Oh-uh, I'm sorry for that I guess… well it looks like you've done pretty well for yourself. Becoming a professor and all…" she trailed off not really knowing what to say to him. They stood in an awkward silence for a few minutes before the professor cleared his throat and spoke. "It seems that the years have let me grow unaccustomed to you hysteric blathering. Do explain what you were doing wandering around by my house in the middle of the night? I know for a fact you have always avoided going near Slytherin like the plague."

A small smile graced her lips, she _was _prone to bouts of 'hysteric blathering' when she was upset and Severus had been the only one who could ever make sense of what she was saying. Somehow he could take a string of jumbled words, quickly spoken sentences that broke off in the middle, and her incoherent mumbling and extract a clear meaning from it.

"I was coming to talk to you, figured the best place to find you was in your bed." she admitted looking around for a place to sit, there was a leather chair behind his desk. Pushing his greasy hair out of his face, Snape looked up at her and asked; "Why?"

"To talk you out of becoming a Death Eater," She replied nonchalantly as she moved some stuff around on his desk. Had it been anyone else in the world rearranging his papers he would have blasted their hands off, but it was Lily and so he allowed it because in his eyes she could never do wrong. She could spill ink on all of his papers and he would not have minded. ( it would be an improvement over what ever the imbeciles he was forced to instruct had written in his mind.) Satisfied with the amount of space she cleared, she hopped up onto the desk and crossed her legs. She for some unknown reason always preferred sitting on desks, tables and even, to her mothers displeasure, her kitchen counter, when talking to someone. She supposed it made her feel taller or more powerful. Severus had always been bothered by it, his reasoning was that _' If table tops were meant for sitting, we would not have chairs, besides, no one wants an arse on their work space, Lily.' _Sure enough something in his face twitched for a moment. _ Still the same strait laced Sev. _

Making no comment on her choice of seating he asked how she intended to talk him out of it. "Well," she began, shifting around a little to get more comfortable. " What I said about you, being brilliant and powerful and all before was true. I really think you are, or were the smartest student in Hogwarts." She paused for a moment to see if he would register the compliment he never was good with that, not that he received many compliments in his life. Mostly just insults. "My plan was to sneak into Slytherin, find your room, quietly wake you up and try and reason with you, make you see that you didn't need to follow some genocidal maniac to prove your self to every one. You and I both knew you were a great wizard, who cared what everyone else thought."

Something underneath the cold hard surface of his face changed, like a small fire being lit in an empty, cold and damp room. She had thought he was a great wizard. Lily Evens, thought he was a brilliant, powerful, great wizard when they were teenagers. He longed to hear that for over twenty years. Buried deep under Severus Snape's air of forbidding confidence, under his hatred, his misery and all the defense mechanisms he built over the years there was a lonely man; a young boy who secretly just wanted to be admired for his knowledge and skills, praised for doing well, encouraged to peruse his ambitions, and most of all be liked. When they were young, before Hogwarts

she did all of those but as the years went bye she no longer admired his knowledge ( nearly everyone at Hogwarts could tell her about the magical world), the spells he knew failed to impress her, she disapproved of his ambitions and finally she stopped liking him.

It left him heart broken.

Pretending to ignore her compliments Snape in his smugly sarcastic way, asked just how she planned on getting into the common room of Slytherin house. " During the Prefect's meeting on the train the Head boy and girl give the house passwords out to their respective prefects." He nodded, as head of house he chose the passwords. "So I _'accidentally' _knocked them on to the floor and took a good look at the Slytherin password when I picked up the papers." _It was better then your original plan to scare it out of a first year. _

"I think," she continued "You would be very proud of me actually. My whole plan was very-" it took her a moment to think of the right word, she leaned forward and lightly placed her chin on top of her fingertips _"Slytherin-esque" _

Severus snorted, _Lily Evens _and _"Slytherin-esque"_ did not go together. "I find that hard to believe. Do tell, Miss Evens, in what way would you deem your plan … as you so eloquently put it,'Slytherin-esque' "

With a proud smile Lily told him all about the planing she put into this; how she used James Potter's infatuation with her to her advantage in order to get the invisibility cloak so she could sneak around. Snape remembering that this was a sixteen year old Gryffindor admitted he was mildly impressed that she was able to be that manipulative. He always wanted her to be in his house.

"You should have seen him. He could barely talk straight and his face was redder then his tie" she laughed with gesture to her own. " Severus you have to admit; it's pretty ambitious to try and talk some one as stubborn as you into changing your mind. It was cunning of me to manipulate Potter into lending me his cloak _and _my plan to invisibly sneak into Slytherin in the middle of the night is rather sly. Last time I checked that was the criteria needed." Lily finished triumphantly.

"Far better then I'd have expected Lily." despite his dry tone, he felt a small amount of satisfaction in Lily behaving in a way that befit one of his own.

_Ah yes, your as good as the sneakiest and slimiest of snakes. Congratulations, now all you need is to learn some dark magic and you're in._

**Thoughts? **


	6. Chapter 6

Severus Snape had always wanted Lily to be in his house, but in the back of his mind he knew, since before they even go to Hogwarts, that she never could be. She was to selfless, it was no surprise she gave her life for her son. She had always defended the 'underdog', she was the kind of person who would give you the shirt off her back. Syltherin's naturally looked out for their own best interests above anyone else's, Lily put everyone else's personal safety above her's. The girls in his house were no were nothing like her; the Black sisters (Andromeda the exception, for the most part), Millicent Bulstrode, Pansy Parkinson, Tracey Davis, the Greengrass sisters, and even his mother, none held a warmth in them the way she did, they were cold in a way, some bordering upon frigid. He doubted any one of them ever did anything kind for someone with out having an ulterior motive, or at the the very least, the thought of how it could benefit themselves crossing their mind. Even as Lily Evens told him of her 'Slytherin-esque' plan, he couldn't see her being like any of those girls, even Andromeda. No. Lily was far to good.

"Petunia was god awful this summer." Lily began, breaking him out of his thoughts. "Worse then usual I think. Maybe I was just around more, or it was because she delighted in the fact that we were no longer friends but what ever the reason, she was unbearable." The Potions Master didn't say any thing, but he didn't have to. Lily knew he understood what she was saying and that he was listening. "She never missed an opportunity to remind me that I didn't have a best friend any more while she did." In her most shrill voice she intimated her sister. _"How does it feel to know that not only are you a freak here, but in that by their standards you're a freak, in the freak world?"_

_"You know it's nice not having that little cretin around here. Do you know how embarrassing it is to be the girl who's sister is always seen with that greasy guttersnipe from Spinner's End?" "Sister dear, it's not healthy to spend so much time alone in your room. Why don't you go down to the park with Sever… oh thats right I almost forgot, silly me. You don't have any friends any more."_

Petunia's words were harsh and he could tell that they cut Lily deep. In all the years since it happened, he had never once really thought of how Lily felt that summer. He figured that she spent it with her other friends, she was popular and he had doubted she even missed him. From what she just told him it sounded like her summer was a lot like his though. Severus's summer was spent locked away in his tiny decaying room with nothing but the spiders and the flies caught in their webs for company. He never remembered being more miserable in his life then he was that summer. He was heart broken and alone.

His parents never paid much attention to him even when he was a young child, to busy trying to make ends meet or fighting with each other to notice their only son most of the time. When he was very young, his mother of course paid attention to him but as he grew older and could do more and more on his own, she paid less and less attention to him. By the time he was sixteen she could go days without noticing he was even around. His father wasn't much better, in fact he was probably worse. The man didn't like much of anything (including Severus) and had a temper worse then his son's. Wether he noticed he was around or not didn't really matter because he hardly spoke to him anyway. The only times Tobias ever really said anything to him was to tell him to do something; _"Severus, get off your arse and go help your mother." , "Take this and pick me up a pack of fags. Bring back my change, I'll be countin' it boy!" , " If yer told to do something don't be lettin' me hear ya didn't do it. I didn't raise no son, to have 'im disobeying me. You hear me boy? Answer me!" _

Severus could remember being taken aback when his father questioned him as to why he seemed more miserable then usual.

He had been heading from the bathroom back to his bedroom when Tobias stopped him; "Severus you've spent every day of yer summer in yer room lookin' like some one died. Where's that red headed friend o' yours, whats her name, Daisy? The two of you have a fallin' out?" Severus was taken by such surprise that his father even knew Lily existed, let alone notice that he wasn't spending time with her that all he could manage to say was "Lily, her name is Lily." before his feet brought him back to his room so he could sit on his bed and stare at his wall while he replayed every moment of his friendship with the girl in question in his head, again, like he did every day. It was the most fatherly thing Severus could remember him ever saying.

He wasn't sure if know, at the time, that Lily spent her summer the same way he did would have made him feel better or worse, but it didn't matter now.

"Eventually," Lily said, continuing, "I couldn't take it anymore and told her if she mentioned you or something related to you one more time that the restriction on underage magic could damn its self because I knew a curse that would make her look like you, to which I may or may not know the counter curse to, and I'd love to use it on her. Her face was priceless."

Snape knew although what she said could be take as an insult, he had over the years become so used to the things people said about him that he hardly even noticed anymore. "I'll take it that she did not call your bluff then." he stated rather then asked in his typical board sounding tone.

The corners of her lip curled up slightly as she said "Well, I really wouldn't call it a curse. More of a jinx really. Its not as if you are a hag Severus."

Severus grunted as if to disagree " Undoubtedly invented by Potter and Black as yet another way to mock me."

Lily's gaze quickly shifted down to her lap and a rosy color began to creep onto her cheeks. "Uhm… well actually… no. I did…" risking it, she took a glance at Snape who's only visible reaction was the raising of his eyebrows. "But no to mock you. I swear. And since then I've added to it. I've turned it into more of a charm that changes your appearance. You know, kinda the way a metamorphmagus can change." She added hastily.

"Well then… I'm quite curious as to how such a _jinx _would work. Do demonstrate." His tone much like the one he used when speaking with his Slytherin's, not that it was a pleasant tone… not in the least bit. Nodding, Lily did as she was told. Taking her wand she tapped the part of her hair, holding the wand tip on her scalp of a second. It looked as though someone had spilled black ink on her head. Starting at her roots, her shiny red hair tuned to greasy black. Following this, she took her wand and traced it down the length of her nose. For a second, the facial feature scrunched up as like someone about to sneeze but instead in grew longer, protruding from her face more, a bump formed in the bridge. It was very odd to watch, Lily's small, pretty, straight nose turning into his large, crooked, hooked nose that he would bet was just as greasy as the hair.

_How in Merlin's name does he stand his hair feeling like this all the time. It's been less then a minute and I already want to wash it._

The new feature settled onto her face, still looking pretty, not quite a pretty as she usually did but still attractive none the less. The spell was very well done, with some spells that changed appearance the transformed feature looked a little off, as if it had been stuck on as an after thought, but not in this case. If some one had never seen Lily before they would never be able to guess that it wasn't the nose she was born with.

It was honestly quiet shocking for him to see the combination of his hair and nose looking so natural on Lily's face. He found himself comparing her charmed face to the face of Harry Potter and wondering if, he (Severus) and Lily were to have had a child together, would she look like Lily did at the moment? Shaking sad and frivolous thoughts from his head Professor Snape clapped his hands in a slow sarcastic manner. "Impressive." At this Lily, in a perfect imitation of his teenage self scowled and shot him a glare. "You are not the only one who can invent spell you know, _Professor _Snape. Incase you have forgotten, I am very talented in the area of Charms, quite similarly to the way you surpass everyone in your talent in Potions"

"Yes, I see. Now enlighten me _Ms. Evens_ as to how this could be used in any other way then to mock me?" If his tone was less then friendly she took no notice, she was one of the very few people, like Dumbledore who were immune to his sharp tongue.

"Well I will have you know I invented it because people mock you. Trust me. None of the Gryffindor girls dared to say anything about you after I unleashed this." Lily told him, flicking a clump of greasy hair out of her face.

"Yes I am sure they were terrified of looking like Snivellus."

"The week before Easter break, fourth year, all of us third and fourth year girls got together in one of our rooms for a sleep over." Severus resisted the urge go sneer. What would one of his students say if they were to see their feared potions master sitting hear, listening to stories about a _slumber party_!

"We were all sitting around taking about guys… and well of course they wanted to know why I said no to Potter. I honestly wasn't in the mood to tell them all the reasons I couldn't stand the sight of him, so i told them I fancied someone else. It was partially true… Anyway they were trying to guess who because I wasn't telling, and joking around Alice suggested that it was you. Well my cheeks must have turned red or something because they all started giggling."

_ More like laughing and then staring like they just witnessed a train wreck._

"So Dorcas Meadows says;_ "You like Snape? Snivellus Snape! But he's… he's… a Slytherin! A Slytherin, Lily, and not even a good looking one at that. You are the prettiest girl in fourth year and a Gryffindor, all the boys are crazy about you and you fancy Snivellus, how is it even possible? I mean I know you're friends with him but he's so…so creepy, I couldn't imagine anyone finding him attractive. What with that greasy hair of his, it makes you wonder if he's ever heard of shampoo, oh and that nose! Lil his nose is so awful, I mean come on it's huge and probably oily enough to fix a squeaky wheel or hinge or something! Please tell us you're joking…" _Well I wasn't joking and I told her _"His name is Severus he is my best friend, and I don't give a damn what house he is in. If you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all." _I never really like her that much, she was always saying nasty things about people." Lily's voice had gradually taken on an aggressive tone as she spoke she had grabbed the edge of the desk beneath her so tightly the her knuckles were turning white.

" A few hours latter we all went to go to bed, I pretended to fall asleep and then waited till everyone else did. Once the all were out I got up and," She brandished her wand and flicked it around for effect accentuating each word "Bibbity bobbity boo! When she woke up it was priceless, she screamed so loud I wouldn't be surprised if you could hear it down here. It was great."

_ To this day the first thing she does when she wakes up is feel her nose, serves her right stuck up little..._

"I guess she could have told McGonagall and gotten me in trouble but she was so horrified she refused to leave our room the whole day!" Lily looked quite smug, getting revenge on the girl who made fun of her best friend. Even when he wasn't around she stood up for him.

"I have a feeling Minerva would be quite impressed with you transfiguration skills considering individual body parts require more precise work. She would have gone easy on you." If he was please that she defended him against one of her room mates he gave nothing away.

"You call her by her first name?" She asked incredulously, as nice as the woman was she was stern and Lily highly doubted she take kindly to being called by her first name.

"She has been my colleague for more then fifteen years."

"Right." Tapping her hair the greasy black coating sucked its self back toward her roots before completely disappearing, a second latter she taped her transfigured nose and it too returned to it's original state.

"It's wonderful that you did something good with your life instead of becoming one of _them._ I'll admit I'd never believe someone if they told me that you would become a professor. You have such little tolerance. You could barely stand me asking you questions in potions, should I feel bad for your students?"

"If you are asking, am I a well liked professor then I see I have put to much faith in your intelligence, I am a professor, I care not if these idiotic children _like _me, I simply care if they can brew. In my tenure I have yet to have one serious injury occur. I do this not because I enjoy teaching, but because I have a job to do. It fits my cause." the professor's face hardened, clearly it was not something he wished to take about, not that Lily cared.

_And just what is your cause _

Something in his voice caught her attention, she was curious now and she was confident if she tried she could get it out of him, or part of it at least.

"And your cause would be what Severus? The Snarky Slytherins for the misery making of unsuspecting students?" Her joke did not go unregistered by the professor "Not quite. That is just a…bonus."

The conversation in the dungeon office was beginning to take a darker turn. Figuring that she wasn't going to get any where just yet she decided to change subject and return to what she wanted later. Lily was determined to find out just what Severus's cause was.

_Good luck getting anything out of him. He wont be so easy to fool, he's not James, he's a Slytherin, sly and cunning are what they do best._

**A/N: So just a little insight into their past, little things may be important later ;) . For some reason I feel like my writing is getting worse…hope I didn't disappoint. **

** Anyway just a little fun fact for you all; When I was writing this I accidentally wrote Guttersnape instead of Guttersnipe and for some reason the memory of that scene in AVPS where Snape is drunk came to mind. :D**


	7. Chapter 7

**It's been a while, sorry guys. **

Lily immediately began formulating a plan to trick him into spilling what ever it was he kept from her. Her problem however was not coming up with a plan, she could think of plenty of those, having recently discovered she had quite the knack for scheming. No, her problem was formulating a trap that he would fall into. By nature Severus had always been, at least as long as Lily could remember, a very guarded person, suspicious of everyone around him, and highly perceptive. He kept his cards close, revealing at most; next to nothing. Even after years of friendship she was sure she had done little more then scratch the surface of who Severus Snape really was. (And that its self was an accomplishment.)

Stoping short of distracting him long enough to A: use the Imperius curse on him (Something Lily felt sick at just the thought of _imagining _having to use on someone) or B: distracting him just long enough to stun him and force Veritaserum down _his _throat, she doubted any of her plans would actually work. Settling for what looked like the best of her pathetic options, she continued their conversation, onto what she hoped would be a lighter subject.

"Have you gotten married?" Looking around she did not see any pictures or anything else that might hint towards a family not even one silly little memento such as a mug that said 'Worlds Best Dad!'. Everything looked cold and impersonal; meaningless possessions put in place simply to fill up space.

The words hung heavily in the air and for a second she thought he would not even dignify her with a response. The subject of his personal life was never something he simply talked about, even at the hight of their friendship.

"No. I see no point in adding such a….frivolous burden to those I already bear. I have no time for foolish nonsense…..I have enough to do as it is." he said cooly.

His words made her frown, for she knew that there was a time in his life where he did hope to marry some day. Although he never did say it out loud, she could tell by the way he listened, and the look the he always had in his eyes when she would babble on about her dreams of the future and living happily ever after with one special person, that secretly he shared that dream.

"It is not frivolous nonsense, it is something wonderful and sacred. Surely being a professor can not be that difficult of a job that you have no time for love and happiness." As soon as the words left her mouth she knew that they struck a nerve. Something about his whole aura changed becoming as hard and cold as the marble beneath their feet.

"As I said before, being a professor is my _profession_ not my _job._ It is through my profession that I am able to do my job. It is nothing more then…. a means to an end." His voice was soft and quiet, but not in a comforting way. There was harshness to it that left the feeling of lead weights sitting at the bottom of her stomach. Perhaps if she was older, more wise in the ways of the darkening world she would have known it was best to drop the subject, but she was not older nor wiser and so she pressed on.

"But surely Severus you must have fallen in love with someone, at least once. Don't think I don't know you well enough to know that under those stiff black robes, beneath all your doom and gloom, you have a heart. No one can be human with out having felt some sort of love at least once in their life." She said, her words softening as she went. Of course she knew love for him would not be easy having received none, or next to none as a child.

For a moment she caught his eyes with her own and saw within them what she could barely begin to describe. Terrible sadness; misery beyond anything she knew. Utter desperation and devastation. A glimpse at crumbled ruins - all that lay left of the hopeful young wizard she met at the playground.

It was painfully heart wrenching to see. So painful she felt the need to tare her eyes away.

"She is long gone." He began softly much like a haunted whisper in the wind, so quiet that Lily felt the need to hold her breath to hear. "_He _was after her. I tried to keep her safe. Protect her. Anything, Lily,… _anything…_ to keep her safe. But," he paused summoning the strength to finnish these painful words. Trying to stop the flood of memories that threatened to break through with the drop of each word.

"She put her faith in the wrong person." he said this last part with bitter regret.

She couldn't image what that must have been like to have gone through, to watch all your efforts fail and lost the one you love most. She felt more determined then she had before on her mission.

_I'll stand by you, I won't abandon you like last time._

"Oh Severus….I'm so…so…Oh God, I…can't even….I am so sorry." Lily said truly feeling sorry for the man in front of her. Snape refused to meet her eyes, fear of her somehow discovering who the woman was, and fear of his own pain glueing his eyes to his lap.

Several minutes of silence passed before Lily, on impulse opened her mouth;

"If it was so long ago then there must be something else making you so unhappy. Don't even the worst of wounds heal with time…"

Meeting her gaze he rose to his feet. Once more the energy given off by the black clad man shifted.

"Unlike the students and most of my co-workers, _I_ am not privy to the… _Luxury_ of blissful ignorance born out of the safety and _protection _found here, in this womb of our society." Severus sneered.

Gone from his eyes was the terrible sadness, replaced by something dark and terrifying. "Out in the real world it is darker then you could ever imagine. There is a war, one that is very much real and devastating. It is as real now as it was then. Don't fool your self into believing that it isn't. As you and your peers will so discover, it is darker then any of you can fathom. There are men that make the likes of Mulciber and Avery seem as harmless as children who do not yet have wands. The rumors you hear do it NO justice!" She flinched at his words.

It was hard for her to believe that people could be that evil, but Lily had grown up in a world where most people were good, people did bad things, but they were not bad people. It wasn't until she reached her upper years at Hogwarts that she got her first tiny taste of what evil looks like.

Severus crossed over the little office standing directly in front of her, the tip of his nose only inches from her own.

"Contrary to popular belief, Lily, this is not some movement… a _radical _campaign led by self righteous crusaders. This is not something that the Ministry will just be able to stop! No one, _none_ of you know what you are getting it to. It won't just '_blow over' _ there is no turning back. Lily this is more then a game… it is more then Slytherin versus Gryffindor, no house points or detentions, only death tolls and devastation. It is war, Lily, _war_. There are real evils, real risks, real consequences,... _real lives at stake_!"

Standing above her with such a dark and fearsome look on his face he was more then intimidating. For a brief second, Professor Snape took joy in seeing the fear in those emerald green eyes as he spoke. So used was he to seeing the arrogant defiance in eyes exactly identical to these that he, for the briefest of seconds forgot who he was talking to.

Horrified with him self he recoiled. He felt joy from Lily's fear even if it was for a second. Lily. Fear. Joy. It made him feel sick.

"They are real friends, brothers and sisters, sons and daughters, fathers and mothers, husbands, and wives, loved ones, they are more then just names that are lost."

For a moment there was silence each as still as a statue, staring at each other like deer caught in headlights.

Quite suddenly, so suddenly that it made Lily jump, Severus turned on his heal marched over to a heavy looking cupboard, his robes billowing behind him. From this cupboard he removed a stone basin filled with shimmering liquid and placed it on the desk.

Lily watched on quietly as the professor stuck the tip of his wand into the water and swished the surface around, watching it intently. Removing the wand he conjured a glass vial. Touching the wand once more to the liquid he pulled several silver gaseous strands and placed them in the vial that he then stoppered. He repeated this, swishing the liquid before pulling stands to package up, as well as adding a few by placing the wand to his temple, removing those strange silver strands. He labeled each vial before he turned back to his guest.

"Do you know what these are?"

She shook her head , eyeing the silvery substance in the one vial for emphasis severs said; "Memories Lily, my memories. This," He pointed at the stone basin, "is a pensive, it is used to store and view memories. When you return to your own time, after you retrieve my younger self from Slytherin you will go to the seventh floor, to the room of requirement. I trust you remember where that is?"

Lily nodded

"Good. You will seek a way to view memories and be provided with a pensive. Pour _these_ memories into it." He held up the glass vial with the green ribbon tied around it. "Force me to view them. If there is anything that could deter me it shall be these memories. They are more powerful than anything you could ever say."

Here Snape seemed to swell, his presence taking up the whole room, in the least of pleasant ways, it was quite frighting. "No matter the temptation you must never, I mean _never_ view these memories. There are things worse then a nightmare, things that would haunt you till your dying days, once seen they can never be seen. Don't take even a peak. You must NEVER under any circumstance view them. Am I clear?" His voice was grave, what ever the memories were she knew they weren't happy.

"Yes. I-I understand."

sitting down, he continued.

"In the morning, you will take this one," he picked up the memories tied with a scarlet ribbon, "down to breakfast with you, when you are done eating you will approach the head table. When you reach the table go directly to the headmaster, do not make direct eye contact with any one, but do not make it obvious. You will tell Professor Dumbledore, and _only _Dumbledore that you must speak to him urgently concerning Fawkes' disorder. At this point look him directly in the eye and nod."

Lily wondered what that could possibly mean. She didn't even have the slightest idea who or what a Fawkes was, but she felt confident in trusting that Severus knew what he was talking about.

"Once in the headmaster's office you will tell him… everything. Of the ending of our friendship, your plan, how you acquired the password to Slytherin and the invisibility cloak, ending up here-"

"Won't I get it trouble, I mean I'm pretty sure I could be expelled for all this. Stealing a password, sneaking across the castle, breaking into another house, the _boy's _dorms of another house, practically kidnapping someone, sneaking them back across the castle and-" Lily interrupted becoming panicky as her courage began failing her at the thought of her wand being snapped, and being forced to go back to the muggle world.

"I do believe this, " he shook the phial slightly, "will provide the… _leverage _needed for the Headmaster to… _overlook _a few… harmless infractions. I have found him to be a rather _understanding _man."

Lily was slightly skeptical, the Severus she knew always disproved of the Headmaster's leniency when it came to rule breakers. Then again if _Severus _was approving of such plans then surely Dumbledore would.

_I hope this works._


	8. Chapter 8

The hour was late, it would only be a short time before the sun began creep over the horizon. Lily's body was beginning to feel the effects of the late hour, but her mind was sharp as a tack. She was nervous, suddenly her self imposed task seemed much harder than it had when she climbed out of the portrait hole. How she ended up nearly twenty years in the future she did not know, but she decided to settle for one very simple answer: Magic.

The question on her mind now was how to get back to her own time.

Professor Severus Snape paced back and forth in his office pondering the same question. She had just ended up here, no rhyme or reason. There were time turners of course, but they only go by hours, not years.

After some time he came to a far fetched conclusion; she had been concentrating so hard on finding exactly what could help her change his young heart that through her magic she somehow unknowingly willed her self here.

He knew it sounded impossible even to someone who had witnessed feats of unimaginably powerful magic. It was the best he had though. There was no theory as to how magic worked, not at it's core, of course there were answers to how aspects of magic work;a spell , or transfiguration, why substances work together in potions, but no answers about magic it's self. No one, not even the unspeakable knew _why_ magic worked, where did it come from, or what made someone a wizard or witch while others were squibs and muggles. If anyone ever did know the answers, they had long since been lost and Severus had a feeling the actual answer to how Lily ended up in 1995 was located in the realm of such ancient magical questions. It frustrated him that he could not fathom such possibility but he had no time to dwell on it.

It would take an incredible amount of magic to return Lily to her own time and on the subject of time, they were running out of it. In a few short hours the school would be teeming with life once more. Although Lily may be able to pass as just another Gryffindor to a student from another house, it would be impossible for her to go unnoticed by those in Gryffindor, not to mention any professor would recognize her instantly. If she were to for example, run into her son, it would cause disaster. It was imperative that she remain unaware of the events taking place in her future. Not only would it be horrific to gain such knowledge about your rapidly approaching death but it could also have damaging effects on the fabric of time.

They had to act now.

Professor Snape stopped abruptly in mid stride "Gather your things and follow me."

Doing as she was told, Lily pocketed her wand and the map, placed the vials into a pouch she nicked from Severus's desk, grabbed James' cloak, and hopped off the desk.

She had to jog in order to keep with him and even still she trailed several feet behind, watching his cloak billowing behind him. _Looks like a more dignified version of that coat he used to wear._Together they trekked throughout the castle attempting to find the place in which she crossed from the past to the future. The school was still bathed in complete darkness, the sky had yet to turn the eerie blue indicating that Dawn's rosy finger's would soon streak across the sky, ushering in the sun.

* * *

><p>Standing at the end of the corridor that the redhead first arrived in, Lily looked to the haggard man. THey black of the night had begun to fade to blue but the corridor was unaffected, dark enough to swallow light. "I suppose you wouldn't tell me how this whole thing turns out would you?" she asked.<p>

Severus raised his eyebrows inquisitively and Lily knew he was asking '_what do you think?' _She smiled sadly, "Right, I suppose only _time_ will tell then."

Taking several steps forward she stopped "Professor, the little boy from the play ground is still there. He is hidden, very well. He has always been an expert at going unnoticed but he is not gone. No matter what happens he will be there and I am happy for that. I was always fond of him." Leaving the professor stricken by her parting words, she walked off into the darkness.

Lily felt the too long falling sensation in the pit of her stomach once more before she softly landed on her feet. After patting her pockets to make sure she had everything "Severus? Professor Snape can you hear me." she called but there was no response.

She was still surrounded by darkness but decided to slip on the invisibility cloak just as a precaution. Lighting her wand with a muttering of _"Lumos" _she saw that she was standing in the middle of the entrance hall.

_This time traveling thing really needs to learn a thing or two about consistency of destination. _

Shining her wand's light on the stately grandfather clock nearby she saw it was only half past midnight, it was if Lily never elf, she wasn't even tried. If it were not for the fact she could feel the weight of the memories encased in glass, in her pocket, she would have thought it to be nothing more than a strange dream. But it was not a dream, it was reality and she had a mission to complete. Standing around wouldn't get her anywhere.

Once again she set off in the direction of the dungeons from which she just came. Lily no longer wondered what she would say to convince him not to be a Death Eater, but rather what would she say so that he would believe her. She knew the whole thing was absurd sounding. it was not as if she could wake him and say : _"Get out of bed and come sneak across the castle with me to a room that changes to give you whatever you need, in the middle of the night, under this invisibility cloak I borrowed from you worst enemy. Why you ask? Because I want to show you memories of yours that you gave me nineteen years from now." _

That would go over really well.

The less questions asked the better, most people would be too groggy after just being woken up to think about asking half the things someone who was fully awake would, but this wasn't most people, this was Severus Snape. The moment he woke up he was as alert and clear minded as ever. He would demand an explanation before doing anything.

_Tell him that you want to talk to him about being friends again._

_No. He would ask why not wait till day time. If I was so urgent about it, why not do it at home and save the trouble off getting him in the middle of the night?_

_Just drag him there?_

_And risk getting my arm hexed off? No thanks._

_Tell him what happened._

_That would earn me a life long stay in the psych ward at St. Mungo's_

Deciding that to trick a Slytherin she would have to think like one. Calling on her inner Slytherin once again, she began forming a usable plan.

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><p>Wishing she brought a heavier cloak Lily pulled James' closer to her, it did nothing to help her but it did smell nice, like freshly done laundry. Considering it was the first night of school it probably was freshly washed.<p>

This time around Lily Evens managed to make it to the entrance of Slytherin's common room without running into any professors (It was highly unlikely that Professor Slughorn was even awake, let alone walking the halls) or falling into a different decade.

Finding the suite of armor along the proper section of wall, she whispered "Cottonmouth." The knight stepped aside to reveal a door that appeared out of the stone wall.

Stepping into the house of her own home's rival was more than odd. It was nothing like the tower nor was it like what she had imagined it to look like. Over the years eh had formed a mental image of what the Slytherin common room looked like based on descriptions from Severus.

She had imagined that when he had said it looks very green that he had meant it in the way she meant her common room was very red. In the sense that the couches, chairs, curtain, and rug were green. She had imagined that there would be polished silver accents, and it would be built of white and grey marble with plenty of lamps to compensate for the lack of natural lighting due to it's position under the lake.

Instead it was carved out of the same stone the rest of the dungeons were, by green Severus meant bathed in green light given off from the emerald colored gas lanterns fixed on the walls, the celling was low by Hogwarts standards, no more then fifteen feet tall, the fire place was a grand focal point. Ornately carved with intertwining serpents and two large skulls that looked incredibly realistic it was beautiful and yet frightening. Getting a closer look she saw the whole place had more stone carvings then a gothic cathedral, the furniture too, made of heavy dark wood was beautifully carved and looked as if it were as old as the school its self, but was not shabby or worn looking. In the center of the room were couches, so different from the squashy cozy looking ones in Gryffindor, these were low backed,black leather, with buttons that looked as though they were stiff and uncomfortable.

Not being able to resist temptation Lily sat down on one. It was not as hard as she expected it to be, but she suspected that had to due with years of constant use, over all she preferred her own any day.

The Slytherin common room was cold both literally and metaphorically. It was not inviting, it fit the attitude of the house's students. It was too dark to see out the windows but she knew through them was a view under the lake, she decided it must be cool to see during the day but in the dead of night it was not. Lily could hear, over the dying fire the eerie swoosh of creatures swimming bye and the haunting sound of mermaids singing in the distance.

The more she stood around the less she liked it. Lily couldn't understand how anyone could live down here for seven years. _No wonder Slytherins are unpleasant. _

Climbing the boys stair case till she found the room with her former friend's name on it she pushed open the door and stepped into the room.

Here is where the two houses held the most in common. The beds were hung with a different colored version of the silk bed hangings, the room was set up the same, and the only difference in the furniture was the lack of clawed feet in favor of bed posts carved to have a snake winding around each one.

The curtains around each bed were drawn shut. Not wanting to search each bed (it was bad enough to see most of those boys during the day) her knowledge of the boy came in handy. Knowing him, he would never sleep next or across from the door it was, too vulnerable. He would't want to sleep closest to the closet, there would be too much disturbance, so that left only one bed. Sure enough when the still invisible intruder pulled open the green silk curtains there was Severus Snape, sound sleep.

He lay on his side , his greasy black hair covering the part of his face not burrowed into the pillow, he looked relaxed something he rarely ever was. It was almost odd for Lily to see him looking so young and peaceful. For as long as she knew him he looked as if he was always deeply troubled by his thoughts. She quietly watched him for a moment before softly calling his name and nudging him. At this he did not wake but instead mumbled something that sounded like her name. Lily tried again a little louder and with more force. Again this only prompted him to say her name.

Feeling a bit devious Lily Evans lowered the hood of the cloak revealing her face and sat down on the bed's edge. She brushed the hair from his face,running her fingers through the greasy locks repeatedly. "Sev"

A small smile formed on the sleeping boy's lips once again he mumbled her name.

_Time to kick things up a bit. _

Leaning in so her face was just inches from his she called his name again shaking him with her free hand. This time his eyes flew open. It took the Slytherin a second to register what he was looking at but when he did he shot out of bed pulling a wand from Merlin knows where and knocking her to the floor in the process.

"Who are you?" He demanded standing over her with his wand pointed at her face. Looking up at him completely unfazed by his behavior, she replied

"It's me Lily." Pulling off the rest of the cloak she continued; "Now move your want out of my face before I snap it in half and feed it to that pathetic fire in you common room."

When his wand didn't move she narrowed her eyes "Sev I'll tell the whole school your ticklish and _so help me God_ I will tell them about the time you nearly peed your pants. Move. Your. Wand."

He did as told and allowed her to stand up. "How do I know you are who you are telling me you are?" Suspicion glinted in his coal like eyes.

_Oh boy! Not this again._

"Severus,there is no one else in this school who would practically climb into your bed and put their hand in your hair. If you haven't noticed you aren't well liked around here."

Instinctively he raised a hand to his shoulder length hair. He did not posses the confidence that his older self did, his shoulders were drawn in and he was clearly nervous. "Lily?"

_No I'm the blood Headmaster! _

"What are you….How in Merlin's name did… where did…" Severus found him self so confused that he could not speak properly. Sighing she grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to the common room to explain.

Standing by the fire which she relight Lily noticed how sickly Severus looked. She couldn't help but wonder if he took the loss of their friendship as hard or maybe harder then she had. He was thinner, a scary sight considering he always looked underfed, his hair was mangled (but that could be attributed to having just woken up) there were great bags under his eyes, and his skin even in the dim fire light had an unusually pallor look to it.

Maybe it was the green lighting .

Her staring was beginning to make him self conscious. Her scrutinizing eyes were like coal on his skin, he wasn't sure how much longer he could stand it.

Finally she spoke, "I'll explain on the way, " Severus opened his mouth to question her but she ignored it. "but basically I just spent an entire summer in the house with my sister. It gave me way to much time to think and I've decided that you are not going to be a Death Eater. I don't care what I have to do, you will not become one." Her tone was very matter-of-factly.

Noticing he was shivering despite the fire Lily sent him back up the stairs to retrieve a pair of shoes and his cloak, after all it was a long walk to the seventh floor and the stone floors get cold at night.

When he returned she was sitting on one of the couches, only her head visible as she had put on the cloak once more. Standing up she nearly laughed at his bewildered expression. "Don't ask questions, I'll explain latter. Now get under the cloak, it's going to be a long night."

Still looking unsure about trusting her, she rolled her eyes. "Trust me Sev, you will thank me latter. I know it for a fact." She said.

Sagging in defeat the disgruntled Snape did as told and together they set out towards the Room of Requirement.

_This is going to be one long night..._

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><p><em><strong>Thoughts anyone?<strong>_

**__**_So I had a lot of fun writing parts of this, I was sorted into Slytherin on Pottermore ! I had a feeling I would be and thought it was cool to write about how I pictured the common room. _


	9. Chapter 9

**_Hello there... lovely reader. It would be greatly appreciated if when you reach the end of this chapter you could take a look at the A/N for a second!_**

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><p>Following the future professor's instruction she stood in wonder as a door appeared where there was seconds before just solid stone. Inside the room a stone basin similar to the one Lily had seen in the Potions Master's office sat on a pedestal in the center of field the housed a replica of the play ground where Lily and Severus first met. Taking a seat in her favorite swing she watched Severus closely. He seemed hesitant to sit down, looking to her for permission to seat him self only a few inches away, Lily nodded. Severus sat in the swing next to her kicking the ground slightly as he wrapped his hands around the chains. "Before we discuss anything I want to know; where did you get an invisibility cloak and how did you managed to enter my house."<p>

Lily had been expecting this and had answers prepared considering she had already explained it once that night. " You ought to be proud of me Sev. I think you've rubbed off a bit over the years, you see I spent quite some time on this plan of mine and it was rather _Slytherin-esque_ if I do say so my self."

Severus raised an eyebrow at her choice of adjective but did not question it outright, rather he waited for her to explain.

"This whole plan is admittedly _ambitious_ considering you're probably the most stubborn person I know. I _slyly_ managed to look at the Slytherin password when they were given to the prefects, and I used my _cunning_ skills of manipulation to talk Potter- don't give me that look Severus Snape- where was I? Oh yeah! To talk Potter into letting me borrow his cloak." By the smug look on her face, Snape could tell that it was her confidence that drove this plan although he could appreciate how very un-Lily like her plan was.

"Well done. However Potter is a daft imbecile. To be manipulated so easily into lending out something so valuable shows just how idiotic he is."

Such a response was anticipated by her. After all she knew how Severus worked better then anyone in the castle. Not that it stopped her from rolling her eyes at him.

_No one ever said this would be easy._

"We're not here to talk about him. If I wanted to talk about James Potter I'd have stayed in my dorm and saved my self all the trouble." She snapped, after all it had been a long night. It was her turn to be the one who controlled the conversation. It was his housemates, not her's that were the problem anyway. "Now Severus I'm probably going to end up sounding insane by the time I finnish what I have to say and explain every thing to you, but you just have to trust me when I say I know what I'm talking about. Promise me that you'll just listen, don't write off what I am saying to you as some sort of late night insane rambling. Trust me this sounds insane to me, like lock me up in a mental ward insane. Honestly if I wasn't the one who experienced it I'd never believe it happened but it did. I guess I should start at the very beginning shouldn't I? I suggest you get comfortable, we're going to be here for a while."

Snape shifted in his seat, weary of what she was planing on telling him. He was still slightly bewildered by waking up to find Lily Evens, _the Lily Evens, _sitting on his bed playing with his hair and having been dragged out of said bed all the way across the castle to a room that happened to look like one of their childhood hang outs.

Closing her eyes for a minute, Lily wracked her brain for the right words to begin with. Settling with telling how she felt straight and working from there,she began. "Alright…. I guess… well…I was really mad, and hurt really hurt when you called me a filthy…. I remember us sitting on the bank of the river and I asked you if being muggle born mattered and you said that it didn't. I felt betrayed, more then that it in a way broke my heart."

At these words Snape's head snapped up, that broke him out of his daze, he was full alert. There was no way that she felt the same for him as he did for her. She was the most beautiful girl in all of Hogwarts and he was Severus Snape the slimy Slytherin. She _did _say he broke her heart though so that must mean his feelings were mutual, right? Severus felt a flicker of hope that quickly was snuffed when he realized that he blew his chance. If she did ever return his love at one point, there was no way she would anymore. Despite his will, his cheeks burned with shame, this did not go unnoticed by Lily.

Deciding not to allow time for an awkward silence Lily picked up where she left off.

"It was weird. I mean I knew it wasn't true, that blood didn't matter. I've known it matters since I was a first year but I never really cared. I just didn't let it affect me, I held my head high and carried on." That was something Snape always admired about her, her ability to be confident in herself no matter what others thought or said.

"If I were to speak metaphorically, I'd say you were the rock on which, for me the magical world was built on. You made it real for me. Somehow despite the fact I'd have gotten my letter and a visit from a professor,I feel as though, if we had not met I'd never have discovered this whole… life. I'd still be Lily the muggle that does weird things, not Lily the witch." Severus looked away, un able to meet her eyes despite feeling her gaze boor into him.

"Anyway like I said, you were my rock, the one that bridged both parts of my life together and your words changed _everything_. In hindsight I saw it coming, for the longest time I was in denial, but I saw the road you're going down. I made excuses, wrote it off as nothing, refused to believe what I heard,convince my self you had a good reason, and when I couldn't deny it I ignored it and chose to think of you as the boy who I used to know. For years now that rock had been eroding away, with every dark spell you learned, every bit of hatred you felt, every time you hung out with those creeps and that day by the lake the rock finally crumbled sending my world crashing down around me." Lily stopped for a moment, forcing when felt like a lump of led in her throat down. She refused to let herself cry any more over this.

"I felt out of place here, like suddenly I no longer belonged at Hogwarts. If my blood wasn't good enough for even you, my _best friend _then maybe… I don't even know. I thought when I got home things would be better. I was wrong, it was worse because I no longer had anyone. I have other friends here, but over time I fell out of touch with the few muggle friends I did have before Hogwarts." If possible Severus felt even more ashamed of what transpired that day by the lake. There was no one in the world he cared for more then her and the last thing he ever wanted was to hurt her.

His summer had been just as miserable as hers. The guilt he felt plagued him at all hours of the day. It kept him up at night and when he did find sleep that fateful day played in his memory over, and over, and over till he woke up, tangled in his bedsheets, covered in sweat and screaming. When he closed his eyes he could see the look on her face as she turned him away after pleading with her to forgive him. She was all he thought of as he sat in the corner of his room every day.

That summer seemed to be the longest he had ever experienced. Time dragged on slower when alone, his insomnia didn't help matters and at times he lost track of what time it was, what day even. It all just blended in to one never ending miserable cycle. Every now and then his mother would come check in on him to remind him to eat or ask him to run a small errand for her. She never asked what was wrong and he doubted she actually cared to even know, neither of his parents ever took much interest in him. Lily was the only person who ever had, no one else cared to ask how his day was or what was bothering him. Eventually his mother began to leave a plate of food and a glass of water on the small table in his room. He rarely did more then pick at it, not that there was much there anyway. She fed and watered him as if he were a house plant, and yet it was the most motherly gesture he received from her since he started school.

"I spoke to Tuney." Lily whispered almost inaudibly.

Snape's dark eyes cut back to her, she didn't like to talk about her sister with many people, he was pretty sure most of their classmates thought she was an only child. Only with her closest friends did she mention her sister and even then it was '_my sister is not a fan of magic..' _or _'Petunia and I don't have much in common. We just don't see eye to eye.' _ the only person she ever confided details about her relationship with her older sister in was Severus, much in the same way she was the only one he ever confided in about his father.

With out prompting Lily continued, "At first she was no different then usual but after a about two weeks she noticed that I was upset about something and that I hadn't mentioned and or seen you at all. I think, well I know she was happy that you weren't coming 'round anymore. She even started acting a bit nicer to me."

_Happy, more like only thing that could have made her happier was if you somehow lost your magic. _

"Anyway one night she came in my room and sat down on my bed saying she wanted to talk. She told me that something was clearly wrong and as my 'big sister' it was her job to help." Severus could already tell that this story wan't going to end well, Lily had always jumped at the chance to make nice with her sister, but her sister was a bitter jealous woman, who even after Lily's death could not let it go.

" So I told her everything, about Potter and his friends, how they'd pick on you, about dark magic,Death Eaters and the whole blood prejudice thing, I explained house rivalries, and how it has been straining our friend ship for years and finally I told her everything about what happened after the O.W.L. She listened to the whole thing, Petunia, my sister Petunia listened to the entire thing. I was probably talking for over two hours and she sat there and listened, she never said one nasty thing. She was asking questions as if she was interested and cared, when I started to cry a few times she even held me." It was here Lily's voice began to crack, it was painful for her; talking about her sister.

"I thought that maybe things would go back to the way the once were, you know before she hated me. She only started hating me after we became friends, I think she was jealous, not only of my magic, but that I had a best friend. Neither of us really had any friends when we were kids, not until you came along anyway, before that we only had each other to play with. I left Petunia alone you know. I think she felt I chose you and our magic over her and my going to Hogwarts was the final straw. I think in her mind she was the one who's sister didn't want her and so she tried to hurt me just as much as I hurt her, except I didn't know I was hurting her."

_"You know its a good thing that you are not friends with that awful boy anymore Lily. He clearly was not a very good friend to have, besides people around town were beginning to talk."_

_"What do you mean… talk?"_

_"He's from Spinner's End, you know what kind of people live down there Lily. Girls like us don't associate with people like him. We're above that. You spend all your time alone with him by the river and it's going to give you a reputation. It's bad enough that they all know you're my sister…I don't care what you do at that school of your's but I will not have my good name dragged through the mud because you like to galavant around with that awful dirty boy!"_

"For a few days things were good. Just like when we were young. Then she just turned on me. All I did was receive a letter and she was back to being the bloody bitch she always is. Worse even. She mocked me. I spilled my heart out to her and she mocked me for it."

_"Where's your freaky little friend? Shouldn't you two be out doing whatever you freaks do?" "You know, you're better off without him. People like you shouldn't even be allowed to have friends." "I'd invite you to come along with my friends and I, but we wouldn't want anyone to see what a freak you are. You know I do have a reputation to uphold, and unlike you I will only be seen with the right type of people." _

"I won't go through that again, It was too much pain too fast. I decided that I was going to bring you back and that is what I'm doing. What I will do."

Looking at her, with that determined look in her slightly teary eyes and a small smile on her lips, he thought she never looked so beautiful. He would do anything to be allowed the privilege of seeing her, including listening to what ever she said.

"And that is just the beginning. I haven't gotten anywhere near the crazy part yet!"

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><p>Severus Snape sat rapt by what Lily was telling him. It was impossible to believe that she managed to travel to the future and speak with him. "I think it was like accidental magic. You know how when we are young we make things happen with out meaning to? Well I think that maybe I was concentrating so hard on finding a way to stop you that I actually sent my self there." She had told him. It was odd hearing her tell him he would be a potions professor "You kept saying that it wasn't your <em>job, <em>it was your _profession. _A means by which you used to do your job." His life did not sound glorious, she said he must have been a successful potions master but there was something he wouldn't tell her. The war was still on and Lily told him all about how he said it went beyond house rivalry. It was dark and bloody, there was no glory to be found on either side, just body counts and destruction. She made no mention nor dropped hints as to if he ever became a Death Eater or not and he did not ask.

"You sounded so miserable, haunted even. It was unbearable and you seemed more then willing to help me on my mission. I don't want to see you turn into that man. I don't know what the next nineteen years will bring but

I know with the path your on they won't be happy."

With out being able to help himself he mumbled "How do you know I won't become miserable _because _you stopped me?"

Her eyes narrowed to green slits as they often did when angry, "Because Severus Snape, if you regretted not joining you wouldn't have given me this." quelling under the ferocity of her tone he fell silent.

From her pocket she pulled the vial tied with a bit of green ribbon and held up. The silvery contents glimmered in the dim light. "They're memories. Your memories Sev. Or they will be one day. I don't know what they are but I do know they aren't good. If this doesn't change your mind then I suppose nothing ever will."

He looked at them curiously for a moment before looking at her. "What am I to do with them…. drink it?" he asked

Lily shook her head and motioned to the pensive sitting nearby casting a shimmering glow in the darkness around it. "It's used to view and store memories. It was you who told me to come here and use it."

She stood and he followed her as she walked over to the pensive and poured the contents of the vial in. Images swirled on the surface, obscured like a reflection in a foggy mirror after a hot shower.

She stepped aside to let him get closer. Peering down into the basin he furrowed his brow but before he could ask, Lily answered his question. " Go on with ye, stick your head in and take a look."

Doing as told Snape took a deep breath and submerged him head in the silvery liquid.

Lily let out a breath she hadn't known she was holding when he didn't immediately resurface.

_Please Merlin, God, someone, let this work._

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><p><em>So It's been a little while, I hope this chapter makes up for it.<em>_** As my wonderful readers I'd like to know wether you would like me to write about the memories Sev sees or would you rather they be left a mystery? (I would create memories as well as use some of the Princes tales) I really can't decide which way to go for it. **  
><em>


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hi… so it has been a while. I want to apologize for that, i know I'm not the best at updating but even for me this is a long time. I have good reason though! I have actually had this chapter done for quite some time, but I wanted to publish it along side a separate one shot of Snape's memories, only I got writer's block and just can't seem to finnish it at the moment. So i've decided to bite the bullet and post this chapter without its companion and when I finish that I will put it up, I'm really sorry guys. **

**My summer started off incredibly busy between graduating, grad parties, and getting ready to move to college things were hectic. Then as luck would have it my computer's logic board fried, causing it to freeze and need to restart. I'm pretty much broke so it took me the rest of the summer to save the money I needed in order to have it repaired, and then college started and well here we are. So thank you guys for all the reviews I've gotten and for sticking around all summer 3**

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><p>Lily watched nervously as Severus shakily hauled himself out of the pensive. For a moment she thought he was going to say something but instead he leaned over, gripping the sides of the basin as if his life depended on it and emptied the contents of his stomach onto the grass covered floor. She quickly moved to hold back his hair, rubbing his back lightly in a comforting manner the way her mother did when she was young. When his retching ceased, there being nothing left in his stomach, she vanished the vomit and led him to a soft looking couch that had appeared in the room.<p>

What little color he did have was drained from his face, he was shaking and the look in his eyes was one she had never seen before. Afraid he might pass out she blurted out the first thing she could think to ask "Are you okay Sev?"

Usually the snarky teen would have some sort of sarcastic remark, since childhood he resented receiving sympathy no matter the reason and used his razor sharp tong to prevent receiving any, but he simply shook his head not even bothering to look at her. After the shaking subsided and Lily was sure he wasn't going to get sick again she tentatively scooted closer to him, grabbing hold of his hand in what she hoped was a comforting children they often would hold hands while Severus told her stories about the magical world. As they grew older they held hands less and less however and when classmates began to tease her saying that he was her boyfriend it stopped all together. Severus had also developed an aversion to physical contact with others as they became older, becoming tense whenever she tried to hug him or accidentally brushed him when walking together in the halls. This time he seemed thankful for it, his boney fingers locking with hers.

"What did you see?" Lily was very curious as to what could possibly evoke this reaction from her former friend. After several minutes of silence he turned his head to look at her. "I-and he-your-I won't let him…" She had absolutely no idea what his words meant as he turned away and began to sake again. There was only one thing that she ever saw render Severus incoherent and that was James Potter, but never like this. James made Severus angry but there was no trace of anger in his voice or on his sallow face and she realized that look in his eyes, the one she could not place was fear. What ever he saw had him terrified and she wanted to know why. Slowly she tried to wiggle her hand out of his crushing grip. Managed to get her hand free and stand up before, as if he could read her mind, Severus grabbed her arm and pulled her back. "Don't."

The professor told her not under any circumstance to look at the memories but she was finding it near impossible to resist temptation. How he could think she wouldn't try to look was beyond her, the one thing she had in common with her sister was that she was very nosy, yet even in that regard they were different. Petunia enjoyed spying on the neighbors and knowing peoples business in order to gossip about them with her friends where as Lily was more the curious sort who stuck her nose where it didn't belong simply because she couldn't help her self.

Sitting back down she looked to him for an explanation as to why _he_ didn't want her to look but he didn't offer any. Sick of just sitting here (Lily was a rather impatient girl) she tired the one sure fire way to get him to say something.

Poking and prodding.

"So did you see all the power and one will gain from becoming a Death Eater? Was it wonderful, everything you ever hoped for? Did you see all the pain the war brought onto innocent people? Did you enjoy that, after all they're not worthy to lick the bottom of your shoe, they're just _filthy mudbl-_"

"ENOUGH!" Severus bellowed cutting her off much to her satisfaction, having gotten just the reaction she was hoping for. His face twisted into a mask of pain and rage.

_If there is one thing you are Severus, it is predictable. _

"You were right. There is no glory, just evil." he said quietly, regaining his composure as he recalled watching his older self commit horrible deeds in the name of his _master. _There was no cause great enough to justify such evil. He was a fool! How had he become so blind, so vile? He destroyed the one thing that was good in his life, killed it. He tortured her son, the one who Potter's face with her eyes and her heart. His older self proclaimed the boy to be just like his father and maybe he was so embittered, twisted up in his web of self loathing and misery that he be believed it, but young Severus could see just how much Harry was like his mother. Yes, he was in some ways like James but not in the ways Professor Snape claimed. Harry constantly stood up for those around him, he never bragged about his out standing abilities going as far as to avoid attracting attention.

For a brief moment he thought someone so wicked as himself should not be allowed to walk the planet, he deserved not even the _luxury _of Azkaban. However he shook this thought from his head, he would be of no use to Lily if he were six feet under. He decided this time he would protect her, he would use the knowledge of what he had seen and stand between her and them. Power and glory be damned! He would stand besides James Potter with a smile on his face if it meant keeping her safe. None of it meant anything when weighed against her life. If there was a way to be good again he would find it, his only hope was that Lily would stand with him while he did so.

Then and there his decision changed his fate and (unknowingly) the fate of the entire wizarding world _forever_.

* * *

><p>For a boy like Severus Snape pride and knowledge were the only things he had of any value. To swallow his pride even when he knew it was for the best was an incredibly difficult task, but he would do it. He was prepared to beg and grovel if he must. After all he was a Slytherin and would get what he wanted through any means necessary.<p>

"Lily." The girl in question who had been staring longingly at the pensive turned her head to look at him. "I believe your little plan has been a success." He said in a way that made it sound as if she was some silly girl trying to get the boy she fancied to take her to Hogsmead. Lily could see right through his apathetic attitude, she knew that it was his way of apologizing.

He was back, her Severus that is.

Lily smiled broadly, throwing her arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his cheek. They sat like that for several minutes, she over come with joy and him relishing in the feeling of her warm body held tightly against his own. "I missed you. I missed you so much." she whispered finally and he knew he was forgiven.

It would take time to heal their friendship completely, they both knew this but it is said that '_if there is a will, there is a way.' _and so it would be done.

"I know this won't be easy for you, they're you friends after all. Just know you won't have to do it alone, I'll be there for you every step of the way no matter what. " She told him pulling releasing the arms he had wrapped around him. Struggling with what to say to express his gratitude he settled for nodding. "Lil and Sev versus the world. Always."

Lily let out a giggle at his words. "And forever. But the world is a lot bigger then Tuney and your dad. We aren't nine any more."

"Exactly, we are no longer children. Together we could be powerful." Severus said seriously. He was right, they were both very smart and powerful. Of course they could not defeat the dark force that was growing outside Hogwarts, but they could have a great impact on stunting that growth if they wished to do so.

* * *

><p>Deciding that it was best they return to their dorms and speak more during their free period the two prepared to head back to their respective houses.<p>

With a quick glance at James's map Lily told Severus, who insisted he could walk back to the dungeon alone, that the coast was clear no professors were patrolling this late and Filch was heading in the opposite direction.

She bid Severus a good night and watched his form retreat into the darkness before slipping over to the still glowing pensive. For a moment she stared down at the basin's contents, contemplating wether or not to plunge her head in. Finally after much deliberation and the professor's words ringing in her ears; "_There are things worse then a nightmare, things that would haunt you till your dying days" _, she simply scooped the memories back into the vial from which they came and pocketed it.

_I'll just burry it in my trunk…for safe keeping._

With that in mind Lily Evens headed back to Gryffindor tower. She found the common room completely empty and was glad she wouldn't be caught sneaking in at such a late hour.

She was half way up to her own dorm when she decided that giving James back his cloak in front of others would raise to much suspicion, two minutes latter she was lightly knocking on the sixth year boys' door.

When she received no answer she assumed they were asleep, so quietly she entered the room and pulled off the cloak. "Lumos"

Using her wand's light to guide her, Lily found James asleep in his bed with the hangings partially open and a peaceful look on his handsome face. He looked _almost _innocent she thought as she folded the cloak and placed both that and the map onto of his trunk.

_He isn't always bad you know, underneath it all he has a kind heart._

Thankfully no one noticed her slip out of the boys dorm, dash across the common room and head up to her own dorm.

_Maybe this year won't be so bad…_


	11. Chapter 11

When Lily awoke in her four poster bed she pondered the events of the previous night wondering how a dream could seem so real. From the flirting with James Potter to traveling to the future but none of it had actually happened…right? _"I really must have eaten too much treacle tart last night." _She rolled out of bed noticing that she was dressed in yesterday's robes. _"It couldn't… no. It had to be a dream!" _

_"Not so sure about that are you now? Check your pocket silly girl."_

Deep in her pockets she felt the smooth glass vials tied with a ribbon, the ones given to her by the future professor. Carefully pulling them out Lily examined the shimmering liquids held within the glass, actual proof that last nights little adventure was in fact real.

_"In the morning, you will take this one down to breakfast with you. When you are done eating you will approach the head table. When you reach the table go directly to the headmaster, do not make direct eye contact with any one, but do not make it obvious. You will tell Professor Dumbledore and only Dumbledore that you must speak to him urgently concerning Fawkes' disorder. At this point look him directly in the eye and nod."_

Suddenly Lily realized she slept later then intended and as is often the reaction when one realizes they have overslept, she began to panic. There was still time for breakfast but not much clearly her morning shower and a fresh set of clothes wold have to be postponed till lunch hour. _"Last nights robes will just have to do for now…"_

Dashing through the halls with her book bag bouncing wildly against her hip and her hair whipping around as if it were struggling to keep up with her just barely managing to hold on for dear life, Lily made it to the Great Hall red faced and heaving but with time to spare.

_Looks like toast will have to do. _

Her plan to shove down some toast and a goblet of juice were foiled when a certain Gryffindor boy called her name. "Lily!" James Potter was practically beaming at the sight of her so despite wanting to get everything done with as fast as possible she went and sat in the spot he cleared for her by shoving Sirius over a few inches.

"Good morning boys." She greeted, dropping her bag down and reaching for food. "Are you feeling better this morning, clear head and all?" Inquired James as he passed the strawberry jam to her. "Oh yes very mush so. Nothing like a good ole bit of boring wandering to change things up." Assured Lily with a smile that made his heart beat just a bit faster. "Indeed wandering can be just the trick to fix a cluttered mind." he laughed

As nice as the chatter was Lily could not enjoy it, time was ticking and breakfast would soon be over. She had a mission to complete and James was standing in her way. If James noticed how anxious she was becoming he chose to ignore it or more likely considering that this was after all James Potter, he assumed that all that talking to him was making her nervous. _"Just tell him to stuff or take that muffin there and shove it into his gob and make a run for it." _

"I was rather surprised to see my cloak on my trunk this morning. Thank you for retuning it so promptly but what I mean to say is that I am not pleased to see that I or rather all four of us slept through someone sneaking in an-"

"I have to speak to the headmaster!" Lily suddenly announced completely cutting off what ever it was James had been rambling on about. Abruptly she stood up, grabbed her bag, and walked off, leaving the boy blinking after her baffled as to what just happened.

_Stay nice and calm Lily it is just Dumbledore, no more then an old wizard. No need to fret, do exactly as Snape said. Don't make eye connect, tell him it is an urgent matter concerning Fawkes' disorder, then make eye contact and nod. Nothing life endangering you can do this._

For all the attempts she made to keep calm it couldn't stop her legs from shaking so badly she nearly had to grab onto something as she closed the gap between the row of tables set for the students and the one reserved for the faculty.

"Is something wrong Ms. Evans?" Asked Professor McGonagall noticing the usually well put together student was more disheveled then an unmade bed.

Keeping a steady gaze on the wall behind the table she responded "No Professor I am fine, thank you."

"Professor Dumbledore," Lily hesitated _What was it I was supposed to say? I can't remember! "The urgent matter about fawk's disorder you nitwit! For Merlin's sake get it together." _Noting that she held the wizard's attention and would look fool if she began babbling "May I speak to you? " She took another steady breath and spoke in a low but steady voice for only him to hear. "It is rather urgent information concerning Fawkes' disorder." _Now look him in the eye, yes just like that. Good girl. Don't forget to nod. See quick and painless you silly girl. _

If Dumbledore was at all alarmed or confused by her seemingly strange words he made no show of it other then turning to Professor McGonagall and stating that he would be borrowing Lily from her first lesson of the day which just so happened to be Transfiguration and that he was very well aware that it was the first lesson of the term but some things just couldn't wait and he had full confidence that Lily would not fall behind because she's meet with her during office hours to find out what she missed.

Until that morning Lily Evens had never seen the Headmaster's office and found it to be exactly what she expected.

"Do make your self comfortable Ms. Evans." The ancient man invited her in as he took his place behind his desk. Once she settled in the wizard set straight into business leaning slightly forward with his hands clasped together on the desk. "Now I must wonder if this newfound information has anything to do with your little adventure last night? I must agree with Mr. Potter, a good long walk does wonders for clearing one's mind I often find my self wandering about late at night." admitted the professor with a twinkle in his eyes. Ignoring her look of astonishment he continued. "So what was it you wished to talk to me about?"

_"Once in the headmaster's office you will tell him… everything. Of the ending of our friendship, your plan, how you acquired the password to Slytherin and the invisibility cloak, ending up here-"_

"Um-erm well I suppose you could say it began when I was nine years old. My sister and I went to play in the park and I showed her some magic, I could make flowers dance at my will. My sister proclaimed that I was some sort of freak but then this strange boy who must have seen what was going on, a wizard as it turned out to be declared that I was not a freak but rather a witch. Petunia deemed him unfit for association because of the way he looks but I wanted to know everything I could about this magic I could do and soon he became my best friend." She never told anyone about meeting Severus, it was almost uncomfortable like she was telling someone that she liked to look at dirty magazines late at night. _She did NOT look at dirty magazines for the record thank you very much!_

" We used to sit on the bank of the river with what ever one of his mother's old school books he managed to get his hands on and he'd tell me about all the stories of magical things his mother told him about when his father wasn't around. We couldn't wait to get here, what could be better then learning magic with your best friend? Nothing that we could think of, other then an endless supply of ice cream but we _were _only kids."

"Ahh well ice cream is a wonderful thing speaking of sweets would you like a licorice stick?"

"No thank you Sir. He promised me that no matter what houses we were sorted into that we would remain best friends and that me being a muggle born wouldn't matter. I should have known that things change after all he is in Slytherin. It worked for a long time we really were best friends but he isn't the boy I met in the park anymore. Last year during O.W.L.'s our friendship came to an end after he called me a rather nasty name. You see he had been hanging around the wanna be Death Eater kids and I couldn't condone such dark things and finally came the straw that broke the camel's back as they say."

"I don't actually have any friends at home the other children tended to avoid me because of the strange things always happening around me. So this summer was sort of boring for the most part and I decided I would make him change his mind about the whole Death Eater thing. I know its because he wants to show that he's more then _Snivly the slime ball _with a rotten muggle of the worst sort for a father. He has this idea that it will make him important but its stupid really because he has much more potential then he realizes." Lily felt that all this was rather ridiculous as she highly doubted that such an important man could actually care about her silly friendship drama but Professor Snape said tell him everything and that is what she was doing. Besides Dumbledore look as intrigued as could be but she suspected even if she was telling him about watching grass grow he would act as if it were a fascinating tale.

"I came up with a plan on the train ride last night and I guess this is where everything kinda of picks up. Originally I was just going to go talk some sense into him but things well they didn't go exactly as planed."

"Even the best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

Dumbledore chuckled, popping a small bright blue candy into his mouth.

_Quite the sweet tooth he's got there!_

Lily Evans had never gotten in much trouble during her time at school, rules were made to be followed and that was exactly what she did. Most of the time after all a girl has to have a little fun now and then. There was really a very big difference between skip homework assignment or a lesson and sneaking around after hours to break into another house. Panic was rising with in her.

"I broke an awful lot of rules! I'm so sorry please don't expel me I know it was wrong but I was only trying to help an old friend. Take my badge away give me detention for ever any thing but snapping my wand-" "That won't be necessary, now if you would calmly explain I'm sure everything will be just fine. No one's losing a badge or snapping any wands today Ms. Evans." Interjected the professor with a reassuring smile.

"Right um-okay." Lily mumbled feeling foolish for her out burst. "Alright well like I said my plan was to just go talk to him so during the prefects meeting I stole a peek at the slytherin's pass word. I knew that if I would have any success in getting across the castle undetected that there was only one person who could help me so I sough out James Potter on our way to the great hall. I know it was rather mean of me to do but I played on the fact he fancies me in order to get help from him and then forced him to pretend I caught him doing something wrong to explain why we were late to the feast last night." The night before she was incredibly smug over her ability to manipulate and sneak around but now in the light of day it was sounding rotten of her to use someone else to get what she wanted even if it was harmless. "He didn't do anything though in fact he didn't even actually know what I was sneaking around for!"

_Never thought I'd see the day you'd be defending Potter's sorry ass. _

_Oh no now don't you go blaming me for all this, it was your idea I just helped you along the way. Yes I am very much aware that I am part of your conscious but no one said you had to listen to me so you have no one to blame but your self._

"I assumed as much. Although Mr. Potter is an accomplished trouble maker he typically waits till everything is all settled in before causing chaos. It takes more then a guilty look and a roll of the eyes to fool me."

"I have to warn you this story is about to sound a little crazy but I have proof that it is all real. I have something for you when I am done." She took a deep breath and plunged into her tale. "I headed off in the direction of Slytherin but somehow found my self lost despite knowing exactly how to get to the dungeons. Here's the thing though I didn't make a wrong turn I need up nineteen years into the future! I had no idea until I ran straight into a professor who I didn't recognize. I feel bad for any stunts who ever dare to cross him, nearly died of freight I did. Initially I assumed he was the new D.A.D.A which seemed to offend him for some reason but as it turned out he was the Potions master. After a frightful interrogation I discovered that this Potions master was none other then the very person I was looking for! It was all so strange you know, Severus kept insisting that this was his profession but not his job. A means to an end if you will. He went on about how dark the war will be and how naive everyone is as to how big this will be. It was absolutely crazy!" She figured probably sounded like a raving lunatic,at any moment she's be carted off to the looney bin but Professor Dumbledore listened with the same curiosity one might have when being told the latest gossip.

" Anyway before I came back to talk to Severus,the one who is sixteen, He gave me something to give to you. He told me it could be used to get me out of trouble for what I did last night and the it would help you. I really don't know how it could help your phoenix but he is or will be the potions expert so…" Lily trailed off while fumbling around in her pocket for the vial tied up in red ribbon.

Dumbledore's long thin fingers gently plucked the glass container out of her hand and examined it for a moment before sticking it into his own robes. "Ms. Evens if you wouldn't mind I'd also like to take a look at the other vial with the green ribbon. Quite clever of Professor Snape to color code them but well we both know Severus is exceptionally bright. I'm sure he wouldn't mind, and if would like to view its contents again I'll be glad to let him come take a look."

Reluctantly she handed over the other vial wondering how in the world that he knew of its existence.

"So you don't think I've lost my mind then, Professor?"

Dumbledore laughed. "Heavens no. Hogwarts is an ancient castle full of magic we do not know of. I think even in several lifetimes one would not unlock all the secrets these walls hold. However I do think that you have just enough time to make it to class if you hurry. Good day Ms. Evens, and thank you"

_That was easier then expected…._


End file.
